Introduction

This is a merge of my 'Wanderer' blog that tells of two years of my three years on the streets, and a new blog that tells of my life after the Diocese of Winchester ripped through my life for for the last few years on top of the previous serious harm that left me homeless
This is a day to day blog of my life as I continue to survive, work on recovery and on the social problems that I have and try to come to terms with limitless traumas I have survived along the way.
This blog is in tandem with my blog about my experiences in the Church of England http://whatreallyhappenedinthechurch.blogspot.co.uk/

The former name of this blog and the name of it's sister blog are to do with my sense of humour, which I hope to keep to the end, which appears to be ever more rapidly approaching. At least I laughed, and I laughed at the people who were destroying me. Don't forget that.

Here are my books, which I wrote for you if you would like to know more: http://www.lulu.com/spotlight/JJNP

Tuesday 4 April 2017

Tuesday

Hey peeps,

I have a new stalkerstat at the moment. Hope you find the blog interesting.

Well it has been a different day.

This morning I woke from the nightmares and booted myself unwillingly to the car.
But the rain, although it was light, was persistent and my customer cancelled. Fortunately before I set off. It had rained a lot in the night and they are on clay soil.

Anyway, so I hadn't booked anything in for the afternoon due to the dentist appointment, so I had a day off. I wish I felt better and could enjoy it.

I ended up doing a lot of sorting out at the flat, the thing is, I think it is the biggest flat I have had, there is lots to do, and I moved in and went straight into full time work with little time to relax and sort things out, so today I got a lot done.

I feel crappy, I sleep at night but with depression and nightmares in my sleep and reluctance to wake up in the morning. And flashbacks during the day.

This afternoon I went to the dentist, and he finished painlessly finishing the operation site, very good, it feels a bit strange but it should settle.
After the dentist I went to the supermarket, I had a shopping list for the first time in my life, how domesticated.
I still forgot the bread.

I got home and I just felt tired, so I lay down on the bed and went to sleep.
I slept for a few hours, troubled distressed sleep. In my dreams I was trying to get to the Samaritans but I was lost on a vast heathland and someone was playing a prank by somehow airlifting a statue.

I woke up and had missed some of Hollyoaks so I went on catchup, and then I decided I would head for the Samaritans, unfortunately they were busy, with no-one free to speak to me, and so I went in the supermarket and got bread and bin bags.

Here I am, tired and unhappy.

Tomorrow I have only booked two gardens in, and in the evening I am supposed to be out with my peeps for a meal. Slight blah but also something nice to look forward to.






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