Introduction

This is a merge of my 'Wanderer' blog that tells of two years of my three years on the streets, and a new blog that tells of my life after the Diocese of Winchester ripped through my life for for the last few years on top of the previous serious harm that left me homeless
This is a day to day blog of my life as I continue to survive, work on recovery and on the social problems that I have and try to come to terms with limitless traumas I have survived along the way.
This blog is in tandem with my blog about my experiences in the Church of England http://whatreallyhappenedinthechurch.blogspot.co.uk/

The former name of this blog and the name of it's sister blog are to do with my sense of humour, which I hope to keep to the end, which appears to be ever more rapidly approaching. At least I laughed, and I laughed at the people who were destroying me. Don't forget that.

Here are my books, which I wrote for you if you would like to know more: http://www.lulu.com/spotlight/JJNP

Wednesday 31 December 2014

Prayers and New Years Revolutions

I pray for the safety of all those out partying tonight.
Death or rape is never a good start to the New Year.

I pray for those who are facing the New Year without hope.
Including myself, because I continue to expect harm to me by the Church of England, and I continue to struggle with the after effects of their harm and the lasting damage to my life and career, as I struggle on in poverty.
I pray that the New Year brings New Hope.

And my revolutions are:


  • Write lots
  • fight back to the church
  • swear less
  • somehow afford the new therapy
  • return to work if I can 
Happy New Year, 5 minutes to go, and then the thankful sleepy warm bed.


New Years eve, evening

Good evening,

Well 45 minutes to go to the New Year, and I am tired but I may as well stay up.

This afternoon I was scooting about on the blue bike, running errands.

Then I came home.

I have spent the evening very peacefully writing.

The manuscript first draft is halfway there, now you just have to work out which manuscript that is.

I have watched back to the future repeatedly, and the sequels, I must know it by heart now, but do I understand it? :)

What else has been on? Nanny McPhee, various comedy stuff, Abba, etc, just been watching while writing, in a very silent house, I think someone came home about 10 minutes ago, while the others are out, but the peace and quiet is awesome.

Mum phoned earlier and we caught up news and wished each other a Happy New Year.

The year ahead will focus on writing, working towards work, working out how to afford the specialist therapy (oy, Diocese, your responsibility, write me a fat cheque), even equine therapy will be hard to afford and it is reasonably priced, and generally it will be a year of writing and development in any way possible, unless the Church of England destroy me, which they will if they can.

38 minutes to go and I am tired, I was up early.

Rain is coming in after the cold weather, and temperatures are going up.

I am completely used to the unheated house now and it is better for my lungs than central heating.


Wednesday lunchtime, New Year's Eve

Good lunchtime,

I woke early in my snuggly nest, after sleeping well but dreaming sad dreams.
I was hot and needed the loo when I woke.
But it was early, so I decided to use the last few hours on my bus pass to get into town and get paperwork delivered and posted and to talk to Royal Mail and to go to gym and swim.

I did everything except the gym and swim. And then I went in church for prayers.

Then I came home, and watched Back to the Future again.

Now my lunch is on.

It is not as cold as recently, and the sun is out.

It is New Years eve so I will do some revolutions later.


Tuesday 30 December 2014

Tuesday evening

The cold weather continues but due to get warmer with rain on the way.
I have watched various films while also writing short stories, and the television switched itself off without me noticing.

I must sort out the bed, which is just all muddled since I swapped things around. I am still sleeping on the mattress but in a different place.

Tomorrow is New Year's Eve 2014. I must celebrate by doing New Year's revolutions and things.
The higher temperatures and the bus pass running out means I can get out on the bike tomorrow.


Tuesday afternoon

Good afternoon,

Well I slept all snuggly in the nest, and woke wondering where the sunrise had gone.

The sun was peeping sulkily out from a bed of cloud, the fog horns were blaring and the frost was thick on everything.
I took a shower and dressed in clean clothes.

I put the bin away and the blue bike enquired nervously about 'Having To Go Out In This Weather?'
But the untreated roads carpeted with frost and ice are not safe for blue bikes, No Skiing!

I set out eventually, the sky remained grey, with fog low and thick frost, I covered many miles, enjoying the countryside and thinking, and eventually I decided not to do swim and gym and came home, cold and tired.

My housemate is drunk, he is very talkative when he is drunk, and he gave me soem teabags because he doesn't drink tea.

I have been moving furniture again, just to try and settle myself down better, I put my mattress at the back of the room and the sofa bed at the front, and moved the spare tv so there is just my tv there and I intend to further rearrange until I am more comfy.

I just got to watch most of 'Goodnight Mr Tom' I wonder what is on next. Goodnight Mr Tom is a very emotional film and it can cause me flashbacks.

Ah, The Parent Trap is on! :)
And Chitty Chitty Bang Bang is on again later!

Monday 29 December 2014

Monday afternoon

Good afternoon,

Well, this morning I walked over to the bus stop with my cup of tea. We have a rural bus that comes up here, one bus an hour during weekday daytimes only, and my cup of tea was too good to leave.

So I put my cup in my backpack when I finished the tea, and off I went on the bus.

The weather was very heavy frost and ice, with wall to wall sunshine. Very cold.

I got into town but the post office qeue was too long, so I went on with my journeys, enjoying beautiful landscapes and seas.
Then on the way back, the qeue on the post office didn't seem to have moved at all in two hours, so I went back to the local post office on the way home.

The birds were walking on ice on the pond, pecking puzzledly at the ice.

I have put my orthotics in the trainers, even though they are designed for boots, but they are helping me to walk better.

Some of my washing was nearly dry and some is still slightly damp, not bad considering that the temperature hasn't gone much above freezing, and the washing froze during the night.

I still have caretaking duties today, but Wallace and Gromit is on later too.


Monday Morning

Good morning peeps,

Well it is a quiet Monday with the sun rising peacefully.

I slept all comfy but dreamed a lot, nightmares, distress, difficult dreams, mainly the Diocese and the Church troubling me.

I woke as the sun was just rising over the fields, and it is so peaceful here. A thick sharp frost is covering everything, especially my washing that I put out last night, it is due to be a sunny day, but the temperature will only rise to a few degrees today.

Last night I walked over the recreation ground, it was cold but not unbearable and the stars were out.

I think I will go out and about in about 45 minutes.

Meanwhile, I have to work out how I ended up wearing my black jumper, I must have been busy in my sleep.


Sunday 28 December 2014

Sunday evening

Good evening,

Well I didn't go to church today. I was tired, lazy, restless.
So When I finally got myself ready, I booted myself out for bus riding.
It has been a bitter cold day, with temperatures just above freezing, but glorious wall-to-wall sunshine.
So I enjoyed it to the full, wandering contentedly around, and visiting a few lovely places and enjoying the views.

Eventually as the sun was setting and the cold increasing, I came home.

I put the small but powerful oil heater that was brought yesterday on, and then I cooked a huge roast meal.
I chopped up loads of chicken fillet, did loads of special potatos, and some carrots, and also cucumber, cheese, tomato, brown bread and butter and lightest philadelphia.
My housemate wandered in, drooling, he says my cooking always smells delicious.
Haha, I am not really a good cook, I just fling things in the oven :)

I watched ET as it was on in the kitchen and I put it on in here, and I did the washing up and am just doing domestic odds and ends.

Outside the temperature is below freezing but I need to go out to the bins.


Sunday morning

Good morning,

Well I dived into a snuggly nest of bedding and slept.
Woke just after midnight needing a wee and a drink.
Slept again.
Dreamed a lot, especially about JM and a world between life and death.

Woke just after 9am, with the sun streaming in.

I missed Herbie again, but it's the one I have on DVD anyway.

I have had a cuppa, I am watching Movie themes on tv.

There is a Mass at 11 if I go, but I want to go out and about today, have a mooch and a wander.


Saturday 27 December 2014

Saturday evening

Good morning,

Well, the blue bike has arrived here, and it is snuffling worriedly about 'Moving House All the Time!'

Anyway, I felt lazy, watching television all the time and eating goodies, cuddled up in the duvet. It can be hard to move when the house is cold and the duvet is warm.
Eventually I booted myself out for swim and gym, but I forgot my wash kit, and the leisure centre was closing early, so I only had a swim.

I came home, and my friends were going to drop some things off. They have dropped off my bedding, so I now have two more duvets, three more pillows and two blankets.
They also brought me a little oil heater as there is no heating or heater at all here.

I am tired now, sleepy.



Christmas Prayers, belated, let's call them New Year's Prayers?

Good morning.

Lettuce pray:

I pray for the Archbishop who has pneumonia. For a swift recovery.
And for anyone else with pneumonia or illness that has affected their Christmas, for healing and peace.

I pray for all the homeless at Christmas, especially rough sleepers who have lost hope, and see Christmas as a time when all sources of warmth and shelter are closed. Especially those in the snow and bad weather.
I pray for families homeless at this time, for hope, and that they are shown kindness.

I pray for any bereaved at this time, who are grieving, and for whom Christmas is an anniversary of loss. Comfort for them. Amen

I pray for all people who are like the drunk man on Christmas Eve, who see Christmas as a time to get drunk and put their health at risk, so they miss out on the joy and peace of the day. Safety and peace in Jesus Name.

I pray for any person who faces increased abuse or violence at Christmas, anyone who feels in danger or threatened, for their safety. Safety and peace for them, amen

I pray for all who feel lonely, unloved or hopeless. For joy and hope of new beginnings.

I pray for any child who didn't get presents or love on Christmas Day, for love and joy to be theirs from Jesus.

I pray a blessing on all who have helped and supported me this year. Especially Bob Hill and the two people who keep regular email contact with me.

And most of all, I pray that the Church of England repents it's duplicious ways and does indeed restructure, to remove the abuse of power, press propaganda and corruption and wrongful influence.

And I pray for Jersey, where the City of London and the Finance industry and Church decide who governs the island, and Islanders suffer as a result. I pray in Jesus Name for that system to be broken and those who have covered up or excused abuse and protected wrongdoers at the expense of their victims to be called to account. In Jesus Name, amen.

Blessings and peace to all, in Jesus Name, amen


Saturday morning

Good morning,

Well yesterday afternoon and evening, I lazed comfily in my duvet, enjoying television, tea and food.
And in the evening I continued to sort out my posessions and room.
I put the mattress on the floor, otherwise it was like trying to sleep on top of a jelly!

I folded the sofa-bed into a sofa, and actually it is more stable like that, I could sleep on that, I guess. But the mattress on the floor seemed comfy enough, the only worry was the cold in an unheated room.

But when it came to bed time, I was warm from the shower and bundled up warm, and I only had trouble getting to sleep out of recent habit.

But I slept, and I slept the most delightfully peaceful sleep, dreaming a bit towards morning, sad and far away dreams, but I woke peaceful in the dark, and was too comfy, so I dozed.

I got up and a glorious sunrise was pouring in the patio windows.

I had intended to get up early and go to swim and gym, but I am too driven and it is still the holidays, so a lazy start is better.
I missed 'Herbie' but 'Scrooge' is on.
And the sun is shining after yesterdays storms.
It's funny, the apartment was so dark that I had to have the lights on during the day. Here it is so light even with the curtains closed, and I get the sunrise in the morning, it rises over the garden and fields, peaceful and quiet. Lovely.

I can't wait to get the blue bike here :)


Friday 26 December 2014

Boxing Day evening

Good evening,

Well. I was feeling so lazy this morning that it was difficult to change into dayclothes in the cold, especially as I was swaddled in thermals, fluffy jamas, luxury dressing gown and duvet, watching television.
I drank tea, ate toast, drank schloer and ate pringles while watching Pinnochio and then Santa Claus, and the Snowman on repeat.
Eventually I persuaded myself into clothes, especially as Back to the Future 2 would be shown on repeat on +1 so I wouldn't miss it. So I was able to boot myself out for a walk.

It was raining, sleeting, snowing wetly, nothing settling. My weaker leg and foot ached a lot, because I have only the new trainers which are not supportive at all. So Although I like walking, I am in pain and not walking well. I miss the blue bike as we are half an hour from town and very isolated up here.

But anyway, I walked to the main road, got a bus, and had a walk from town along the seafront. A very different walk from yesterday, the sea was green and calm and the wet cold sleet and rain continued.
On the way back, I got some milk, reduced chicken and Philadelphia lightest.

The answer to the Boxing Day meal, when I got home, was that it is Friday as well as Boxing Day, and I am a Catholic. So I did salmon. I did the cold smoked salmon with philadelphia lightest and squares of crustless wholemeal bread and cucumber and tomato.
A very posh and tasty meal, washed down with schloer.
I created the 'Eton Mess' for dessert, crushed merangue nests, fresh raspberries and fat free raspberry and honey yogurt. But I haven't eaten the Eton, I wasn't hungry.

Then back to reality, trying to sort and arrange my possessions here, as well as watching 'Back to the Future'.

What I have done about the bed is, I have put the mattress on the floor, and I will try sleeping like that, and hopefully, very soon, I can collect my own bedding, including the blankets and big duvet to help keep me warm, as it is very cold here, and the memory foam pillow to support my head.

I plan to relax and have a hot shower and put all the thermals and warm layers back on soon, and then relax in the duvet and watch television.

Wet rain, sleet and snow flakes keep falling but not settling.

The Archbishop of Canterbury has gone down with pneumonia. And while I disapprove of his dreadful showing off and misleading of the general public, pneumonia is a nasty and quite frightening thing to have. So I hope he recovers soon.


Boxing Day morning 2

Good morning again,

I am still in my dressing gown :)

I am watching Santa Claus, and then the snowman is on.

Can someone remind me, is it Salmon or Gammon that is traditional for boxing day? :)

I do have both, believe it or not. I got basic gammon steaks £1.20 at the shop and reduced price Salmon Steaks and also reduced ready to eat Salmon.
But I can't remember what is traditional, and I am not hungry and I still have a turkey meal left over from yesterday as I had no supper last night.

Is it snowing where you are? It is cold and grey with a thick frost here, no snow yet.



A look back at 2014

It is difficult to look back.
I could say it's been a tough year, but when have I ever had an easy year? :) I prefer to say, it has been a year full of growth and development and new hope in things where I thought all was lost. It has been a year full of challenges, a year full of harm by the Church of England and their associated agencies as well though.

In the beginning. January/February:

The year started with uncertainty and turbulance, I was still looking for a place to call home and I was still terrified of indoors and of the Diocese of Winchester and their associates and intrusions and harm to me.

Fortunately I have never been completely alone or unsupported, although the learning curve of learning to live indoors has been like coming off drugs and going cold turkey, and I still find indoors difficult, especially as, and this is hard to explain, after being used to the simplicity of the streets, I am 'house dyspraxic', I break things, bump things and stumble a lot indoors, I get bruised and things get dropped, spilled, bumped or broken. I have no recollection of this happening previous to being a rough sleeper, and it is frustrating.

The weather at the end of 2013 and beginning of this year was atrocious and thus it is a good thing I was off the streets.

At the beginning of February I took a room in a lodging House. It turned out to be like being in a homeless hostel only without Staff. And regular readers will remember, I was without lights, had water coming through the ceiling and mushrooms growing in the bathroom, while addicts and dealers argued over drug money in the hall.
The last straw was the kitchen being locked because it was a health hazard. But during the time I was there, I went cold turkey from rough sleeping and came through to be able to actually sleep at night indoors, albeit with earplugs!

In the meantime the Diocese of Winchester and their associates in Jersey who were doing a cover up for Jersey agencies and police caused me distress, and Jane Fisher's friends at Hampshire Social services decided to break the law and remind me of how they had protected her wrongdoing and refused to protect me from her, deeply distressing.

I continued to plead with Hampshire Constabulary to protect me from the Diocese of Winchester but instead they ignored me, but HMIC then gave Hampshire constabulary a VERY BAD report for doing exactly the same thing to other vulnerable people. About time someone held that corrupt force up to the public for their faults.

Hardly able to walk, and realising how little movement I had, I saw a back specialist and was told that though there was a lot of work needed, there was also a lot of hope. The situation improved steadily but it was to be a long process. The specialist said he could only do a fraction of what he needed to or it would be too painful. But one session was too painful one day, and I was ill with the after-effects, and stopped the treatment, at the time I only stopped temporarily, but as the Church of England problems continued, I was unable to allow time or pain, because I had to fight for my life against the Church. I also had to quit attachment therapy because of the church and because of finances. However, I may be able to resume therapy, not just for attachment disorder but also the rest of the range of my problems, in the New Year, if I can afford it, as well as having the therapeutic horse therapy.

March/April:
One evening as I sat in the early hours, listening to the violent fights in the corridor, I decided to once again override the Diocese of Winchester's branding of me, and I remembered when I was in my early 20s and I had a few happy years in a nice little bedsit. I wondered why on earth I could not live like that again even with the Diocese's branding of me and the loss of my career, I knew I could do better, but how?

I advertised for a bedsit, stating I was quiet and looking for somewhere quiet.
And the advert was answered by one person, the person who had the place of my dreams to let.
This person is referred to in the daily blog as 'The lesser spotted landlady' only as a joke, she is a lovely lady who I will always keep in touch with. I absolutely loved the flat and the council condemning the house shattered my life, but that comes later.

April and onwards:
Settled in a new flat and starting to live a fuller life now, I was unfit and could hardly walk, but as the weather got warmer, I started swimming and doing water-based exercise, and this was the beginning of an ongoing programme to improve my health and fitness, which I believed to be impossible but is now going incredibly well, it was partly despair and depression that led me to believe this and partly what a terrible shape I had got into on the streets and because of the church, I was destroyed. I am amazed at the way things have improved.

The blue bike. I cannot remember when my life was transformed by the blue bike, which gave me freedom, joy and mobility, and improved my muscle tone so well that my walking has improved, and I now walk without a stick, and I started wearing shoes sometimes instead of always wearing boots to help me walk, and now I wear shoes, although I am left in pain and hobbling sometimes. I never thought I would regain mobility and fitness as I have, and a change of asthma medicines as well really kicked off a revolution in my life, with my fitness and health improving immeasurably.

I was no longer terrified of indoors by now, but if anything to do with the church and their associates triggered distress or flashbacks I stopped sleeping and felt trapped.

April and May:

In April? The cold monsters in the Church of England announced they were going to release the Steel report, a biased conflicted report that defames me and defends the wrongdoers with a concocted story by the wrongdoers and their stories and a complete omission of my story, a but like the Korris report only much worse.
I asked the police for protection from harassment by the Church of England and they treated me as they have throughout this matter and acted for the Diocese again.

So I took the Church of England to court. And they seemed thrown by that, I have no idea who took them to court before over this matter, but I recall the Ould Bully proclaiming that he didn't think I had the ability, and in a way he was correct, but to save my life, I did, and they didn't seem prepared and arrogantly offered to the court not to release the report for 40 days and give 2 weeks notice, what utter insanity, how would that make any difference?  It was a traumatic experience for me, but I was left astounded by the lengths that the Church would go to to cover up, yet again. They lied to a court of law! They compiled a complete statement of lies.
Well, I guess I should have expected that as they had already lied to two courts of law and three police forces about me and about their actions, leading to me being branded with an inaccurate record. But dishonesty from senior members of the church never ceases to astound and shock me.

It isn't over.

June/July:

We had a hot summer and I swam every day in the sea, and biked around happily along the seafronts and around town. I barely left the town and got to know people and was generally very happy in the town. I would have been on the beach more but the Church matter took up too much of my time, at the same time as I continued to develop my life through art classes and sessions at the daycentre.
I continued to live in fear of the church, although things had changed.

August/September:

I lost my ESA for a few months and was left destitute and was helped through by friends until my ESA was restored and backpaid.
The ESA system has changed for the worse.

My destroyer, Jane Fisher ruined my weekend with my adoptive parents and friends by adding me on twitter as if to jeer. The problem with her jeer was that I thought it was funny she only had about 27 friends and seemed to think twitter was the same as facebook, and was boasting about her life on there.
I had a minor breakdown so at the time it was far from funny, especially how, after wilfully destroying me, she boasts about being 'passionate about safeguarding', but what the church call safeguarding is not what is safeguarding in reality. Anyway, she boasted about being matey with Sally Dakin etc, and basically that nothing had been done about her serious misconduct. There was no doubt she didn't add me by accident and knew my avatar, after all, she has few friends and few people to follow, and my avatar makes it clear who I am.

So, I contacted the police, who were as helpful as they usually are when it comes to dealing with wrongdoers they protect because of status etc.

I have continued a complaint and they continue to fob me off. However, Jane Fisher apparently deleted her twitter account the same day, I was informed of this by friends on twitter after they supported me through the day and I had complained to the Diocese of Winchester and to the police.
At the time I was astounded that Fisher deleted her account, because she is arrogant and hard-nosed without remorse or conscience and spent three years and more deliberately smashing me down and defending my abusers and their colaberation and condemning and criminalizing me and lying as well. But the church's main focus, especially in safeguarding, is to protect themselves, at the expense of victims. Which would be the only reason she would delete her account.
The same day, a certain someone else related to this, added me on twitter and started asking on twitter what people thought of my legal letter to Bishop Dakin, and what people thought of Dakin. It appeared to be a bait. I gave a few responses for a laugh, not that I felt like laughing. And they left. It took me a long time to recover from Fisher's jeer.

Death.
One evening I looked out the window, having heard noise and the noise continued, and I was shocked to see a man lying on the pavement with paramedics trying to revive him and just giving up, he was dead.
It was late evening and raining heavily and the death became a suspected murder, and the whole night became full of emergency services and noise, tarpaulins and incident tents being battered by wind and rain, and the flat was so hot that I couldn't close the window, so I got little sleep, when I was due to go to my adoptive parents for the next day and had to start out early.
The police did house to house inquiries in the early hours and I spoke to them. I suffered double trauma from suddenly seeing a dead man and then all the police and ambulance all night. It took a while for me to recover.

Photography. I have spent most of the year indulging my passion of photography, which makes me very happy, and my Mum was delighted with my life collage, which she took to show off to our friends.

Two people have been kindly talking to me by email for the last six months of 2014, since Bob ceased to mediate and concentrated on the Jersey Care inquiry, and I appreciate that regular lifeline.

October/November/December:

During these months there was increasing interest from my friends in my written work, especially the short stories and so I have been encouraged to keep writing and look at getting work published, which is my project for 2015.

I was now also exercising really well, doing gym and swim regularly as well as biking everywhere, getting fit in a way I never imagined I would be able to, and also learning to cook and eat healthily as well. If only this had been possible before!

I also picked up my knitting again, deeply keen on creativity and seeing my life expand in all directions with never a shortage of activities to fill my time, I am still a bit hit and miss with my knitting :)

Sadly also, the news came that my home was condemned by the council as unfit for tenants. Unfair as it was a lovely flat in a lovely quiet house and we were all happy, but the council's stringent safety regulations means that the old house needed so much work to meet their standards that it could not be financially viable, so I had to look for a new home.
This devastated me as I had seen the flat as my permenant forever home after years of homelessness.
I am still devastated. We were given long notice but I was so unsettled and distressed that I decided to move as soon as possible and be settled somewhere for Christmas. Haha.

Also during this time, the Church Times released another defamatory attack on me, one of many done by their reporter Madaleine Davis, as well as the defamatory letters they published for Jersey clergy and their supporters.
This left me very ill. But this time I had had enough, the damage was done but this time I stood up to the Church Times and they whined miserably about how they 'Only produced facts' Rubbish, proven rubbish, where was my side published? It wasn't, the only resources they were using were the Church of England's defamatory inaccurate Korris report and the Jersey Deanery smear campaign, without including my side, so, facts? No.

Onwards. I took an expensive apartment in order to remain in my community, but I hated it.
However, two days after I moved, I was able to launch into, and complete within a week, my traditional Christmas walk for charity, 70 miles to provide 40 families with Christmas Hampers and gifts. I had a lovely, if tough, walk, and got hundreds of photos, and came to no harm apart from a shin splint.

I didn't settle in the new apartment, I worried about money, the rent was extortionate and as plumbing and boilers kept breaking, it became increasingly clear that this was a get rich quick scheme for the landlord and it was going wrong.
The apartments were brand new, a converted hotel. No soundproofing, lots of flaws, very uncomfortable and I was very unhappy.
But there was no way I could have replaced the old flat anyway.

I grew increasingly unhappy and tense in the new apartment and wasn't sleeping well. Trying to enjoy the run up to Christmas with the church events, the songs and decorations, but unhappy and out of my depth.

On Christmas eve I arranged rent in lei of notice, put my furniture in storage and took myself and what I needed, and came home for Christmas. I wont go back to the apartments. And I am peaceful here in a tenancy of lower rent and lower demands on me, somewhere I know and am happy enough to be.
And basically, that brings the year to a happier ending, and I am hoping for a better 2015, without needless cruelty from the Church of England.

I have enjoyed my Christmas so far, and was delighted to receive a lovely email from old friends yesterday, people asking how I am as I haven't been around. Heartwarming.

It has been a year of friendships, new and old, and a year of building and growing and learning to relate to people, the reactive attachment disorder and autism continue to stump me and stunt growth (which in turn always reminds me of  the Diocese of Winchester's opinion of me as a result of my problems) but generally my ability to interact is better than it has ever been and I am less afraid of people and my agrophobia has mysteriously dwindled to almost nothing.

In 2015 I start equine therapy and also the more serious and intense therapy focussing on my problems and their origins.

You will notice I have started mentioning my adoptive parents on the blogs, and openly calling my Mum 'Mum'.
Those who don't know the story, this was nothing new, I didn't mention it because while I was homeless in Winchester in 2011, the Diocese tried their best to separate me from my adoptive parents when they were still new friends, but I have realised that despite the massive hurt the Diocese caused, they became powerless to prevent this friendship, despite the many other friendships of mine, long term, loving friendships that the Diocese destroyed because my friends there were Church of England and easily influenced, but my adoptive parents are Catholic, as I am.
This is the story, if you don't know it:
http://whatreallyhappenedinthechurch.blogspot.co.uk/2014/09/my-adoptive-parents-i-wont-look-too.html#.VJ0x-sgJA

Lets go into 2015 with courage and hope. I will stand tall and continue to face off against the Great Grim Church and their vanity and arrogance and I hope they will let me continue to build my life out of the ashes of their repeated devastation of it. Life will be bound by the horrific one-sided record that the Diocese got me as a result of their failure to safeguard, or take responsibility, and all I can do is going on being creative with and in my life and keep up a steady programme of activities to prevent depression and hopelessness, and focus on the good in life, not the bad. I still have flashbacks and distress and I have learned to recognise this and work with it as it will continue this way indefinitely as will the fight with the church.

Happy New Year!















Boxing Day 2014 - morning

Good morning,

Well yesterday I watched a lot of television, as I wrapped snugly in the duvet on the sofa, it was so quiet and peaceful.

In the evening I put my thermals on as I am not used to a cold house, and I tried to sleep, I was warm but unable to sleep, unused to the bed and it doesn't support my spine, so in the end I took some 5HTP and that knocked me out.

I woke this morning, peaceful but I know I was snoring, head not supported and can't find the anti-histamines. I have had several cuppas and will put the television on for Pinnochio in a minute. I need to look at the forecast and think about a walk, the weather is due bad later, well snow, but it will be wet snow and wind here, so I may want to walk before it gets bad as my asthma is bad at the moment and cold air can trigger an attack.

At least I have found my meds, apart from the anti-histamines.

Hm, it's a lazy-shaped day. I am not a mad boxing day sales person, how silly it all is.
The sales last through January and bargains can be had without pain.
What people need to do is relax, and stop the driven life for a day or two at least.
Easier said than done, even I know that.

And you know what? I found my perfect Christmas this year.
Funny isn't it?
Society makes you feel that you have to be with a jolly, noisy crowd of family or friends for Christmas, and if you know me, my routines allow for more solitude than the normal person, because I need that, and yet I still worry about Christmas because sociaety's image of Christmas with others is so strong.

Well, I am not alone, and haven't been alone.
I enjoyed a lovely midnight Mass and Carols on Christmas Eve Night, and in the morning I opened some of my presents, on the blog, to tell you what was in them. Then I had a cuppa and said good morning to anyone else here who was up.
Then I went to Christmas Morning Mass.
Then I enjoyed a lovely walk, and no loneliness as Mass was full and loads of people out walking and shouting cheerful greetings.
Then me and a housemate were cooking our dinners, me a healthy turkey roast and him pork chops.
Then I enjoyed television and relaxed. Much needed relaxing.
Society tries to make Christmas Day alone into loneliness and sadness, and yes, it may apply to normal gregarious people, but for me, it has been bliss, and I needed the time out.

Last year was lovely but let me tell you how a 'traditional Christmas' affects me.
The level of interaction is high and it is always hot with lots of people around and everyone talking, it hard for me to hear, hard for me to keep talking, hard for me to play the usual games that I am cackhanded at, I get tired, the dinner is too big for me, the goodies are too much, and I just want to escape somewhere cold, dark and quiet.

So, I have found my perfect Christmas, it runs like the rest of my life, not alone, not lonely, just doing things the way that works best for me, a full and enjoyable Christmas.

I didn't eat anything last night, basically my Christmas Day calories were not that high at all and I had a long walk, and as for Christmas eve, I was on the move with heavy baggage and hardly ate all day! And the day before that I had a good gym workout. So I am unlikely to have put any weight on yet, but there are lots of goodies left, so I must eat them slowly, bit by bit, with loads of exercise to use up the calories.

Time for television.




Thursday 25 December 2014

Christmas Afternoon

Good afternoon, Happy Christmas.

Well this morning I was having a frantic time looking for breakfast stuff, clean clothes and wash things and generally trying to orientate myself, still tired and in pain.
I didn't have time for a shower but I did get breakfast, clean clothes and a quick brush of my teeth before hurrying off to Mass, relieved that there was the later 11am Mass. I think what matters is being there, rather than being smartly turned out.

I did the traditional Christmas breakfast of toast (not melba toast) and coffee - the perculator broke so it had to be instant, and a few chocolates.
The television in the kitchen was on a touching animation related to the Nativity, very sweet.

My adoptives texted when I was near church, I think they went to an earlier Mass, so I thanked them for the dressing gown, they knew I wanted a dressing gown, but bright pink?! Where did Bright Pink come into anything? :)

I got to Mass late but not too late, and at least 20 people were later than me, including a norty police officer, who was on duty but sneaked in anyway and went up for communion in full uniform, they are not allowed to do that, but it was cool.
At the end of Mass, the excellent Priest got the children to come up and lead us in singing Happy Birthday to Jesus. So cool.

I decided, since I was and am tired, and since my shoes are not supportive and I was down there for Mass anyway, I would do my Christmas Day walk after Mass and come home after that, rather than trek home from Mass and back out in the afternoon when I am more tired. So I did that.

I walked down to the sea, two shops were open, such is modern Christmas. So I got a coke zero and a babybel to keep me going on my walk, don't tell Mum I went in a shop on Christmas Day! :)

Oh what a beautiful walk and a beautiful day! Cold and Sunny, loads of happy people out on the beach and the prom. Festive jumpers, excited dogs and children, glorious sunshine, cold breeze, full and lively sea, and a few Christmas Day swimmers and kite surfers.

I felt very happy as I walked, I walked a mile or two along the front and headed back as I was tired and aching. And thankfully the toilets on the front were open too :)

Home at last, and I put my festive dinner to cook. Turkey fillets cooked in garlic fry-lite, special potatoes, brussels sprouts and gravy. Completely healthy, and no stuffing as I had no stuffing mix, and no cranberry sauce as I don't like it.
My housemate wandered in, following his nose and declared the cooking smell delicious, he could have had some as there was enough, but he did chops for himself, so I have enough festive dinner for tea too.
My dessert was going to be a kind of Eton Mess made out of crushed merangue nests, fat free fruit yogurt and fresh rasperries, but to be honest, I only ate half of my dinner and I am full, so I will leave dessert for later or tomorrow.
I have loads of goodies but I really haven't been very hungry, but I am enjoying a glass of schloer and watching Chitty Chitty Bang Bang on Channel 5.

The official relax time has arrived, and all I will do now is rest, watch television and eat tasty stuff if I feel hungry. There is endless tea, and I will have a shower and put my new dressing gown on later, but all I need to do is relax on the sofa with the duvet, and enjoy television.
I have the massage machine on my aches and pains at the moment too.
What a nice Christmas!
Even yesterday I knew I had been tense and wound tight for so long that I doubted I could relax at all.

I haven't done my Christmas Prayers or look back at the year yet, but I will.

Snow is forecast for tomorrow.

The only things missing from this years Christmas were marzipan fruits and figs, I couldn't find either anywhere! And also my traditional pink Santa hat, I like a plain pink Santa hat, not one that says 'kiss me!' or 'looking for Mr Claus'! Haha.

Apparently the Archbishop of Canterbury is sick with a cold.
Unsurprising.
At Christmas, Clergy are overwhelmed with services and events and some do end up sick, because it wears them down. JM used to always get sick and be on antibiotics and spend her post Christmas break sick.




Christmas Day 2014 - Home for Christmas - oops, corrected the title

Good morning peeps,

Happy Christmas to you, unless you don't celebrate Christmas, in which case, happy Thursday.

Where are the decent teabags? All I can find is floor sweepings tea that tastes like tin! :)

Phew!

Yesterday we put my furniture and the blue bike in storage. I warned my friend as he took the blue bike, it is lively, don't let it get out of control.

Then I took myself and my luggage, and travelled through the day, to get home.

By the evening I felt like smiling for the first time in a long time. Despite knowing I would likely be ill today from the heavy luggage pulling my shoulder. I am not too bad considering three short nights sleep, a lot of stress, the heavy luggage and the long move.

By the time I was arrived with all my baggage, it was time for a cuppa before midnight mass.

It was funny to be back, and to talk to my 'new housemates' so to speak, and then walk down to midnight Mass on my own.

We had Carols before a lovely peaceful Mass, Father is an excellent preacher and I really enjoyed Mass, but as you can imagine, I was very tired and was struggling not to doze in the warm sleepy church in the end.

I came out of church and started answering Happy Christmas texts from others who had been at Midnight services elsewhere, and a very drunk man got a bit too close, no aggression, he was just uninhibited due to drink, but some lovely church people were worried for me, and offered me a lift home.

So I got home quicker in the cold tired night, and I was shattered and it is quite a walk home.

The night itself was a cold and starry one like it was long ago when I last walked to Mass here.
But, the cold air after a day with no meds and lots of activity, was triggering my asthma, and I was grateful for a lift home.

I got home, fell into bed expecting to sleep like a log, but struggled to sleep at all in a 'new' place, colder than the apartments with no heating, as I have got used to the heating, and a bed I am not used to, which doesn't support my spine as well as I would like.
By the end of the night I was sleeping, thankfully, and woke peacefully at 8.20am.
Although I am in pain from yesterday's move, it is not severe and it may go off rather than getting worse.

It is nice not to be alone at Christmas although no one here cares very much about Christmas.
I still intend to throw some turkey fillets and special potatoes in the oven whenever, and there is a Mass at 11am if I want to go.
There is also a lovely walk I am planning, and the weather will be ok.
I have the television on, but the guide is buried and I can't find my decent teabags, but apart from that, all is well.

I still haven't done Christmas prayers or a look back at the year.

Shall I open a few presents for you? See what is in the Big Present? Ok.

Huge fluffy dressing gown! :) luxurious. Someone knew I wanted that, but it is bright pink! What happened to conservative pastels, blue and green? :)

ok,

Photo frame. Thanks Mum! Always need more photo frames for pictures of us and our friends.

Keychain cross, lovely.

Bar of special soap and buff puff. Is that a hint?! :)

Very pretty pen and notelet set. Aww! :)

Special bubble bath. Again with the hints! :)

Happy Christmas, I will now seek teabags and tv guides. And I think if I can find the perculator I will make some real coffee, and I bet everyone wants some of that! :)













Tuesday 23 December 2014

Tuesday Evening

Good evening,

Well I went to collect the blue bike, it was looking smug, especially as it cost me £5 less than the estimate.

I biked home via the shops, I really can't work out what I do or don't need over Christmas, I'm just not used to Christmas indoors.

Speaking of which, I quit my tenancy, because basically this place is dreadful and I hate it and I am deeply depressed here.
There wasn't really an option, as well as being very noisy here with children shouting and no soundproofing, which wasn't told to me to start with,  the apartments are a get rich quick job for the landlord, and it is all going badly wrong, and he tends to blame everyone but himself, as I may have mentioned, as well as mentioning that I am unhappy here.
So after another round of nonsense today, I gave notice, because I really would rather sleep rough, although I am not fully intending to, yet.

Anyway, I biked up to swim and gym this evening and felt a bit unfit after a week away from exercise.

I sincerely hope there are no more tensions here.

Tuesday morning

Good morning,

I had a rough night, mainly due to  other residents being noisy.

I was up at 6pm nonetheless, I had been afraid I would be up all night.

And then I was cleaning the apartments from 7am, so I have a little bit left to do.

I took the blue bike, which was playing up no end, and handed it over for it's checkup and repair. It tried to bite the bike man.
Wait till if finds out it is due a wash!
I hope the work doesn't cost more than the estimate, as I am not well off, and I still have the rent to pay.

I have to collect the bike later. I had to walk home as I forgot my bus ticket.

Life feels quite depressing.


Monday 22 December 2014

Monday evening

Good evening,

I went to Health and fitness. And as I had no other commitments, I stayed around. And they were having yet another Christmas party.
Yummy healthy food. And yes, healthy food can be yummy. It is not ryvita and water, because that is not healthy.

Anyway, I had not gained any weight from snacking this week, but I hadn't lost any either.
So I end my course having lost a load of weight and not gained any in 3 months.

I also got two exercise awards.

I was sad because the raffle prizes were good but I had no cash on me at all.

I left when the party games began, as I am no good at party games, not wired that way.

I went and did another supermarket shop, and came home tired to watch Shrek, all the Shreks are on but I only like Shrek 1.

The house is full of food and I am not on a 'diet' over Christmas, I return to watching my weight after Christmas and I will be exercising a lot over Christmas, as all other activities die down and I have plenty of time for exercise.
You will notice I have been otherwise occupied and unable to exercise much recently.

I am so tired now, the flat is clean, the food is in, and everything has finished for Christmas, lets party!
Only thing is, I have to clean the apartments tomorrow, and if the money is in, I will get my bike sorted out.


Monday afternoon

Good afternoon,

My Writers and Artists Yearbook arrived this morning, so I have been in heaven.

I got two loads of washing done and dried as well.

Then I headed out at last.

A cold and windy day, with the wind giving me an earache.

I delivered the last few local Christmas cards and went to the leisure centre to top up my card and get the Christmas opening hours.

They are so used to me booking gym or swim when I come in that I surprised them by not booking anything today, you may have noticed I have been having a break from my exercise, I have been low, tired, and very busy.

I biked round town, doing this and that.

Then I biked along the front, the bike ride I miss so much.

The sea was full of white horses as it was so rough, but my bike thinks it's a horse, so I never try to catch one.

Then I biked back, the Great Hill was glooming against the wild sea and grey cloud.
It's funny, we live in the shadow of the Great Hill up here, but we can't see it.
From the front door and the little church we can see the Western Hills, which are light green, not dark like the Great Hill.
I miss looking at the Great Hill.

Garfield is on, and then I am going to my last Health and Fitness group, it feels funny, no caretaking today, no church social and the last health and fitness, I am afraid I may have made my first weight gain with all this Christmas food.
Well, I will begin again with enthusiasm in the New Year, I have found healthy diet and lifestyle incredibly easy and I usually feel much better for it, I am just having a bad week.


monday morning

Good morning,

Well I have forgotten to update the blog recently.

On Saturday night I watched some of Kickass and fell asleep.

Woke on Sunday, low energy and facing a busy day.

Headed for church.

We had a lovely service with carols.

After that, I came home and quickly did chicken fillets to eat with bread, at the same time as I cleaned the communal areas of the flats.

Then I headed out, to arrive in the other town in time for ten pin bowling.

We had two teams, two lanes, and two games.

Our team was the faster team, and we were speeding through our second game on seemingly higher scores than the tortoises, when they were still on their first game.
But there is a fable in there somewhere, the tortoises ended up winning.
And the price of diet Pepsi at the Bowling alley bar! £2.20, thats robbery!
It was my first bowling trip for years. And I really enjoyed it.
The others then went to the bar, but I had Things To Do.

So I went off to caretake my friend's house, as the bins go out one day early this week, here and there.
So I got that done, hurtled two bus routes home in time for Carols by Candlelight at my Big Church.
Which was awesome and then there were mince spies and I sat with my friends, then they gave me a lift home.
Then I finished the cleaning, and I was tired, so I went to bed.

I slept a long night, still waking up depressed, so I didn't bother with a day out, I wont go far before Christmas now, just round the local towns.
My washing is on now, so I must stay and see it sorted.
Later I will buzz around the towns, and this evening is my last Health and Fitness evening, although I am slipping because I am depressed.
Tomorrow, I will cart the bike, bucking and snorting, off to the bike shop for a checkup and brake blocks. It's a bit hard to control a nortybike when the brake blocks wear out.

I guess I will do the Christmas prayers soon, like last year, and I will do a look back at the year, if you can be bothered to read it, boring.

I have real coffee perculating, because Mum brought me several packs of coffee when she came. They got me the perculator a while back, when I discovered coffee, and how drinking lots of strong coffee sends me mental :)

Now to dust the bathroom.


Saturday 20 December 2014

Saturday afternoon

Good afternoon,

Well eventually I went out, went shopping, for essentials such as coal tar shampoo etc, and some goodies.
But I got tired and decided to come home, the scenic route.

Town was busy but not packed, and my agrophobia, for the first time ever, has dwindled to almost nothing, although I don't like people bumping me.

It is funny that the media have come up with another click-word, calling this Saturday 'Panic Saturday' as it is nothing of the sort, and they should go back to when I was a child and places closed down for two weeks over Christmas and people had to panic buy then, and there was no online shopping then, and online shopping is why town is relatively quiet.

Anyway, I came home, on the way I saw the sun set over the sea, then the sky glowing red, and I enjoyed the Christmas music on the radio.

I got home in time for 'Nativity' Which is just starting on BBC2.

I put some chicken fillets on, but realised I had got turkey by accident, which is fine, turkey is ok.

Nativity is good, but they made a mistake by making a sequel. Nativity 2 just screams of safeguarding bloopers and police.


Saturday morning

Good morning,

Well I slept a long sound night, too long.
I woke feeling tired and low. I don't want a day out today, and my adoptives are busy anyway, not that that would stop the day out, but today, when I finally wander out of the house, I think I will peruse the towns for Christmas goodies and odds and ends.

The Christmas Radio Times started today but there is nothing worth watching until later,

I finally ate and dressed and eventually I will wander out.

It is a grey and windy day.

Oh, guess what! I ordered myself a Christmas present today!
The Writers and Artists Yearbook 2015.
Lets go mad! :)

The enthusiasm for my short stories that have been shared locally means I will proceed with enthusiasm to start publishing work next year.
Just stories as yet, nothing to scare the Diocese of Winchester into their periodic insanity, although, should they launch more insanity, I will publish my full book about them :)
I think I will call it the 'Rage Book' in honour of their oilycreep friends the Church Times.
Or I could call it 'Church Times'.


Friday 19 December 2014

Friday evening

Good evening,

Well I did chicken for lunch,
Then I found an old favourite film 'The cuckoo'.

Eventually I went out riding on the buses, enjoying the christmas lights and the christmas programme on Radio 2 in my earphones.

I got back late, and I am tired, so I will go to bed now.

The stalkerstat has been going wild.
Stalky, c'mon, get a life of your own,
prying in my life can't be a permenant obsession, surely?

Friday lunchtime

Good lunchtime,

Well I went to the bank,
And while I was there I checked when the bike shop would be open next week.
To ensure that the blue bike gets a christmas checkup and brake blocks.

I also got some fluffy slippers and a pair of very much needed trainers.


Friday morning

Good morning,

Well I slept a long sound night, busy with dreams before I woke.

I got up and have only been slowly coming to life, especially as I started out in pain, I really need to do something about support for my head and neck as I sleep.

Anyway, I am showered, dressed, fed, and the flat does look nice :)

I have also installed a new printer as the old one got dropped and broken in the move.

I must nip to the next town, to the bank, and then it is a free day, unless I go to the party at club tonight :) diet coke and dance music!

Tomorrow I may have a day out and see the adoptives and do a bit of shopping, I desparately need shoes and things.

It is a  sunny day with very strong winds.


Thursday 18 December 2014

Thursday evening

Good evening,

Well I went out in the stormy windy weather, to pick up my prescription and then go and do the Big Shop at the supermarket.
I have not done a Big Shop while I have been here, I have been living on dregs, struggling and kind of just surviving here.

Anyway, I did the big shop, and the wind up at the supermarket tried to grab some of my groceries, including my flowers, again, it was like back at the time when the wind took my football and flowers up there before, only I got the flowers back both times and lost the football.

Anyway, eventually I got home, tired and hot, and painstakingly unpacked everything and cleared out any stale or dry food from the cupboard and fridge.

Then I did the bed linen, did the bed out in it's new linens. The bed has been a messy problem due to being halfway between a single and a double, and thus having no sheet and the scruffy old double duvet cover on it. Now it is done out in a soft Jersey sheet, a white version of my old blue Jersey bedding - which got left in Jersey. I like soft Jersey bedding. But the new duvet cover and pillowslips are smart blue and white checks. Wow it looks so much better, and all of a sudden the whole flat looks better.

The bathroom has a new loo brush set, and the sitting room is decorated and has the tree in it, as well as the changing colour candle with new batteries in it.
There is also a real candle lit.
Then the bed is smartly dressed and the toys all neatly grouped on the bed.

The television surface has a new bunch of flowers on it, the first flowers I have had here.
And the coffee table and box are covered in Christmas wrapping paper and are already sideboard to oranges and dates and chocolates.

The flat is generally looking a lot smarter and more 'homeley' as the landlord described it earlier when he popped in.

And there is the small tree by the door, and there is the tree I put in the communal area.
And guess what, the cards are staying on the wall now, they have ceased to hurtle like lemmings.

I have had very little time to admire the stormy seas and galeforce winds today, but I just walked over to the cliff, and it is windy but mild, and raining lightly, while the sea remains rough and the wind galeforce.

Tomorrow is a bit more relaxed, as far as I know! :)

I am tired after last night, so I may well sleep well in a very comfy looking bed.


Thursday afternoon

Good afternoon,

Phew! I am exhausted! :)

This morning I was collected to visit the horse therapy centre, I start there on the 5th of January as my timetable changes and I go up a level.
So cool, I can't think of anything nicer than working with the horsys, it was amazing to watch and hear about the horsys, so cool! :) awesome, peeps! And it may well help me a lot.
Horses have soft noses, I like stroking their soft noses.

Then I was dropped off to pick up my tree and to shop for decorations.

I picked up my tree and also got a little one for the communal area.

My tree is 6 foot, imitation spruce or was it pine, looks sprucey.

I got some decorations, and I came home, and put the tree together and decided that some more poundland lights would go down well, so I went into the next town and got lights and other much needed odds and ends.

Then I came home, very tired now, and decorated the tree, and the landlord knocked on the door as I was working, and I showed him the tree and the new television.

Then I completed the tree, and it does look a bit special, it is 6 foot, and I put it up in the sitting room, by the window, so all can enjoy it, and I did the lights, then the angel, then tinsel, then bead garlands, then ornaments, and then the kind of stuff you scatter over the tree to finish it off, and then I switched the lights on and put the presents under the tree, you must see it, peeps, there must be a way of getting a picture online at some point, it is so special.

And the other lovely thing is, the Christmas CDs that I am listening to on repeat are great, I got them in a charity shop a few weeks ago and they provide lovely background music.

It is a very windy and rainy day here, strong winds and dark clouds sitting on the hills, and rain blowing in.
Now I am planning another shopping trip, to the supermarket to start getting the Christmas food in.
I have moved the coffee table to next to the box on wheels in order to make space for the tree, so I think the coffee table and box can be covered in Christmas paper and used as a sideboard for the goodies :)

Now to set the Santa Trap.




Thursday morning

Good morning,

Please excuse the lack of blog.

I have been preoccupied with attending to my Mum on her visit and then yesterday a mixture of busy, no internet and other troubles.

On Tuesday morning the alarm went at 6am and I lay there for what seemed like ages, feeling very much like I didn't want to get up.
But I got up, washed, dressed, made sure the flat was even neater than it's usual new pin status, and set off on the two bus journeys to collect mother.

The night before, at church social, one of my friends had been commenting on how it was to be a glorious day on Tuesday, after all the jinxed visits and planned trips with the adoptive parents, so the weather wouldn't affect the visit.
Well, Haha, as I set out, thig fog was hanging in the air, and as I listened to the travel news in my earphones on the bus, all the transport was delayed!

Well I got down to the travel terminal in the foggy cold early morning and hoped for the best.
Eventually I watched the fog lifting, and my mother arrived, safe and sound, and about 15 minutes late, but she got here.

She got here earlier than usual and we enjoyed a scenic bus ride.
We got home and she inspected the new flat and pronounced that she approved of it, mother's seal of approval.
We had a cuppa and exchanged Christmas gifts, although we are likely to meet up again before Christmas and in the holidays.
But it is nice to have the gifts to go under the big tree, which I collect later today, and the flat is overflowing with decorations waiting to go on it.
The piles of gifts and decorations look lovely but lonely, waiting for their tree, and I have moved the little poundland tree to table by the door, so the tree can go in the sitting room, by the window.

Anyway, Mum and I walked down the cliffs to a cafe she is fond of and likes to visit when she is over here. I am fond of them too, nice people, good food, good prices.

The fog had lifted to a glorious winter's day.

We enjoyed lunch there and then went shopping, as we do.
Back to the flat and then I had to return Mother to her transport home, she had hoped I was going back with her but I didn't have enough spare money for the fare.
I will nip over in the next few days.

Yesterday was a day when everything went wrong, internet and phone down, multiple other stresses and generally a difficult time, and then in the afternoon my friends came round with my Christmas present, a band new freeview flatscreen tv, and a year's licence fee paid for. Aren't my friends cool? :)

So yesterday evening I rearranged the flat to get the tv onto a decent surface and get the place for the big Christmas tree sorted out.

Then I had a very rough night, and have only had a few hour's sleep. Not because I was watching television, just too much on my mind.
I spent a lot of the night writing as I couldn't sleep. I did not have the television on.

I am so glad I did sleep for about three hours, because although I have had to cancel my swim and gym as I am too tired, I am going ahead with meeting the horses today, and getting familiarized with the place where I will have horse-therapy and find comfort and development in working with the horses. Horses are better than humans at being therapists, they listen to all your problems and then snort and shake their heads and laugh horsely and you realise your problems are nothing.
Horses also have soft noses, and I am obsessed with soft things.

At 6am I went to the supermarket as my money was in, and got some much needed essentials, and the Christmas radio times, and since then I have been busy circling programmes I want to watch, as well as eating the chocolates that I am supposed to thread on the tree.

I am being collected to go to the horses in less than an hour, and then after that the real Christmas shopping starts, with the collection of the tree and many decorations and goodies.


Monday 15 December 2014

Monday evening

Good evening,

Rushing around, the usual Monday chaos.

Busy day, Monday is always busy but this was twice as busy as usual.

But when I took a lunch break I found a nice big christmas tree in a chattery shop, for only a few pounds,
so the decorations wandering around my flat will be on a big tree soon, which is good, as they multiply like rabbits, and while there are still no hooks in the walls, the decorations are simply all over the furniture and doors and mirrors.
I wonder if the hooks will ever get done.

I will collect the tree in a few days.

All my work is done but I am tired, and the migraine lingers.

I am still losing weight, and although my health and fitness programme ends next week forever, I will continue the work.

This evening I went to church social, and it was the last one until January 12th, so that is another monday thing finished, making mondays less busy.
We had a lovely evening and some nice food with tea and coffee afterwards.

Tomorrow my adoptive mum finally manages to get here, and I miss one coffee morning and one Christmas party in order to entertain her, and she is well worth missing those things.
I have to get up early and make two bus journeys to collect her from the travel terminal, but we have a nice sunny winter's day to look forward to.




Monday morning

Good morning,

I am not in court this morning, obviously. I am just pottering about before the real busyness of the day begins.

I slept through the night but woke at 3am, dreaming I was in a que and needing the loo, thankfully there was no que for the ensuite, so I went to the loo and went back to sleep, waking this morning, still with a migraine, but it is background, especially as I have thrown drugs at it.

I ran out of milk, so I went to get some milk, some bus fare and some lozenges, and I posted 4 cards on the way.
Today is one of those days when I kill many birds with a few stones, I think the birds I kill will be the noisy seagulls who are doing an out of tune chorus out the back as I write this.

It's another cold grey day, which is fine by me.


I must motivate to get the flat ready for Mum's visit before I head out for my busy day.


Sunday 14 December 2014

Sunday evening

Good evening,

Well I had a good roast lunch, then I have been busy writing, mainly short stories for my friend to appraise.

Then I have been writing the next batch of Christmas cards and preparing for tomorrow.

Monday is my busy day, and tomorrow is no exception, but I will have the ipad with me so I will be able to update and email while I am on the move.

The busy day tomorrow runs into the delayed visit by my adoptive mum on Tuesday, but thankfully the flat is clean and in order, so that will be ok, I have to collect her on Tuesday morning.

This evening I took a break from writing and enjoyed a walk along the cliffs in the dark, it was drizzling and the sea was wild.

I still have a neck ache and a migraine, which is a pain.

I am also sad that no one has sent me my alpine advent calender this year, please can I have my alpine advent calender, even though it is a bit late? :) It's from Jacqui Lawson.
I like playing with the alpine calender, it is so christmassy.


Sunday lunchtime

Good lunchtime,

Well last night I managed to get to sleep and sleep through the night.

I woke in the morning with a head and neck ache from sleeping without moving in obviously the wrong position.

I got up and had a shower and did some writing, I kept meaning to walk over to the cliffs but church time came round and I was still writing.

I biked down to church.

Church was a delight today, we had carols and christingles.
I enjoyed the carols but was not allowed to eat the sweeties of my christingle until after the service.
Then I ate mine and offered to eat everyone else's.

After church we had the usual coffee and chatter. I sat with my friends, and Postman Pat came round with cards for people, because the church do a system where you can drop off your cards for people and the cards are taken round by Pat after the service.
I have tried to make sure my cards to church people were nativity ones, so as not to offend anyone devout (wonder where I learned that from!) but funnily enough, a majority of the cards I got today were glittery church pictures! :)
I also got a spare christingle, a tin of biscuits, and an update on my television.
I was amazed! The people getting me a television have offered to get me a new television with freeview, and pay some towards my licence. I have only got my licence in the last few days.
Wow.
And please tell me that some channel, any channel are showing 'Are you Being Served?' over Christmas, or send me the DVD box set.

I am just doing dinner, chicken fillets with special potatos and carrot and parsnip.

I biked home along the cliffs, and looking out the window at them now, there are snowy stormclouds looming.

Saturday 13 December 2014

Saturday evening

Good evening,

Well this morning I got paperwork and laundry done due to waking so early, and I went to the shop for bread and milk, but then I was tired and went back to sleep from 9am to12.30pm.

I got up again, wishing I could sleep properly.

I got on with chores, but it seems no matter what I do at the moment, I get absolutely nothing done, and the flat always looks trashed and dirty no matter how much I clean it, why can't it scub up as well as the old flat? It depresses me.

I have been out riding on buses for hours, first enjoying the lovely clear winter sunshine, then the sunset and the landscape lit up in a pink glow, then the dark and the Christmas lights.

I have just got home and am doing pork chops with potatos fried with salt and garlic.

I am recovering from the cold, and all will be well if this slight chest infection clears quickly.

Can I do my Christmas list? can I? Can I?


  • Writers and Artists Yearbook 2015
  • chocolate
  • printer that works
  • books
  • DVDs
  • wifi that works
  • more chocolate
  • goodies and nice things
  • food
  • a car 
  • a pony
  • a villa in the south of France
I always ask for the last three but I never get them.



Saturday 4.30am

Good morning,

I woke at 3.30am, full of nightmares and distress.
Thankfully the cold isn't too bad now, but I am worried about so much at the moment, less than 2 weeks to Christmas and I don't even have a pound for a locker at the gym this morning. The flat is still difficult to manage and I am in chaos and without money.

It is going to be a cold day today, but bright and sunny, so that is ok.

I am working out how to do gym with no locker money, and how to get some letters printed and sent as my printer was broken in the move. As was my camera's software CD and numerous things, what a nightmare everything is at the moment.


Friday 12 December 2014

Friday night, floods

Well we survived the gales, and a flood only occured when something in the kitchen plumbing blew.
I was alone in the house, in all apartment blocks, I was the only person home, and then there was water going everywhere in the kitchen and utility room, the landord is miles away and no one was home, so I phoned the landlord, and he tried everyone and finally got the man in the hotel to come over.
The man in the hotel stopped the water, as I had no screwdriver and hadn't been able to turn the water off with a knife.

Then alone, I had a flooded utility room and kitchen to clear. As you know I have a cold, and was trying to avoid a chest infection because of my asthma, well I now have a chest infection, but I managed to clear water from ceilings, walls, cupboards, surfaces, drawers, everything, especially the floor, which was a few inches deep.
I was soaked and I used all my towels and cloths and newpapers and a mop and buckets and bowls.

I am tired and coughing, but the kitchen and utility room are now dry -ish.
I put the heating way up and left the doors and windows open, and everything finally dried, and I then changed out of my sopping wet clothes and had a hot shower, pity all my towels were sopping wet, I had to dry myself on a flannel, before putting on fleecy tracksuit trousers and a thermal top and jumper.

What a disaster! I am tired and feel rough now.

I know this house has teething problems, but when does it stop teething? and does it need such sharp teeth?


Friday afternoon

Good afternoon,

Apologies, yesterday's post was labelled Tuesday afternoon, by accident.

Well, last night I went riding on buses, enjoying the Christmas lights.

Then I came home, and went to bed early, very tired.

I woke late this morning, 9.10am.

I had a shower, did some writing and although I feel rough and tired, I went out after a while.
Biked along the cliffs, enjoying the stormy sea, briefly checked in at coffee morning, then went to drop a card off.
Then I had my good old bike along the seafront, enjoying the wild weather and the sea.
A few people were out with wetsuits and boards.

I sat in the beach cafe, enjoying the sea, and realised I hadn't eaten all day and was tired.

Set off home via the shop and the other Christmas tree festival, where I was made very welcome but didn't have my camera, so I will have to go back tomorrow.

Home at last, very tired.
I did chicken and homous for lunch. Read the local paper, and now all I want to do is sleep.


Thursday 11 December 2014

Thursday afternoon

Good afternoon,

Well this morning I walked to the leisure centre as I needed to get some change for the lockers on the way.
It was a cold and windy morning with light drizzle.

I got to the leisure centre and went to the gym first, I overdid the treadmill and things and ended up hobbling.
I had taken a large cloth as I thought my nose would run and the cloth looked enough like a sweat towel, but my nose didn't run during gym, it ran afterwards. And I felt ill, and I decided I didn't want a swim in tepid water.

I walked round to the doctor's surgery to collect my prescription slips, to ensure that I have enough asthma meds over Christmas.
They had done all the scripts but had given me one wrong med, how annoying. So I have to go back for that on Monday.

Anyway, I hobbled towards home and stopped to drop the prescriptions off at my local chemist.

I got home, had more tea, and got on with cleaning the communal areas for the apartments.

By lunchtime I felt really ill, but I walked down to get my meds, then I went to the lunch club, dropped off the cards for the elderlies, and picked up a roast turkey dinner to bring home, it is only a short walk so the roast dinner was still hot and delicious when I got home.

Then I fell into bed and slept.

I woke and felt tired and shivery, as you do when you sleep in the day, so I turned the heater on, and did coffee, and started cleaning the flat, I did the bathroom first, and now the whole place looks a bit better.

I walked over to the cliffs, it is a cold windy afternoon with lots of dog walkers out, and ships sheltering in the bay, the sea being blown by the wind, and dark clouds hurrying over.

I feel a little bit better, so I may go out riding on buses.

We are just working out if my Mum comes over tomorrow what with the weather and me having a cold. It may wait until next week.


Thursday morning 6.22am

Good morning,

Well I woke at 4.40am, which isn't too bad.
I only slept lightly, dreaming a lot, probably not sleeping too well due to having a cold.
The cold is bad but not the worst I ever had.

I have been writing as I have DWP trouble again.

I just went out the back to check the weather, it is cold with a bitter wind, no rain yet, I may get the bus up to the leisure centre for my gym and swim as biking in the cold wind with a cold may trigger an asthma attack.

There was a cat sitting outside the back door, I think it got the wrong house.
No one else is up yet.

And the ruddy cards just fell down again! :(

Wednesday 10 December 2014

Wednesday evening

Good evening,

Please excuse the lack of blog, I have been rather busy.

I woke this morning feeling tired and stressed, and I had a shower, several cups of tea, and got on with the cards for the elderly folk. I found I was 10 cards short, so I sent an email and I was to hand in the done cards and get some more today, which I did.

A busy morning went ahead, but I felt ill and tired.
I realised when my friends collected me for the Christmas Dinner, that I was going down with a cold, which rarely happens, but at least I can't get flu, cos mean old doctor jabbed me.

The meal was a delight, there were 35 of us, and the food was excellent and the staff were lovely, it was at an old manor house which is now a restaurant, rather posh, but we were allowed in.

So, we had a lovely time, but when I was full of roast turkey dinner, I felt even more ill and tired.
So when my friends dropped me home, I cancelled the rest of the day's activities, even this evening's vital activity, but they understood as other people had called in sick the same.

So I wandered into my bed and slept for two hours.

I woke up to the news that the downstairs boilers have failed, so we have no heating down here, it is a cold december night, but my room is warm so I am not bothered, the manager spoke to the landlord and he got her to give me a heater just in case I got cold.
The boilers will be fixed tomorrow when the landlord gets here. It's ok though, because I am warm and I don't need anything.

I walked up to the shop, got reduced ham, cucumber and homous for sandwiches, and then I went in the other shop and got some Beechums all in one and some lozenges, I thought the lady at the counter would be worried about serving a customer with a cold, but she had a cold too.
I so rarely get colds, but I must encourage the cold symptoms to go so that it doesn't affect my asthma.

It is a cold clear night with strong cold winds, and bad weather is due in, which may yet again disrupt the visit my adoptive mum has planned for Friday.


Tuesday 9 December 2014

Tuesday evening

Good evening peeps,

Well I have felt tired and low this afternoon, and as well as the sore throat, I developed a mild but persistent nosebleed, very odd.
I don't feel great.

This evening I headed for gym and swim. It was windy and rainy, such a change from the cold clear recent weather.

I got to the leisure centre and realised I had very little energy, I swam, and felt a bit better, did gym, not a huge training session, very gentle, and I cut short the treadmill session as my leg ached.

it isn't very far between the leisure centre and home, but in this weather I decided to get the bus home, only trouble was, someone annoyingly came into the bus shelter and lit a cigarette, so I decided to walk home and stop at the shopsfor something to eat, I am not hungry with such a raging throat, so it was hard to find anything, in the end I got a mini trifle and a soft pie.

As I walked home, I seemed to meet everyone I knew, only trouble was, it is hard to tell who people are in the dark with their hoods up.

I am feeling tired, rotten, and I want to sleep, only trouble is, I have about 30 Christmas cards left to do for the elderly folk, because everyone deserves some Christmas cheer, and my personal Christmas cards are only part done as well, and tomorrow I am busy from early until my friends collect me for Christmas meal, and then I will come back in the afternoon and back out again for the evening. Harhar, busybusy. I must get these cards done.


Tuesday afternoon

Good afternoon,

A very tired blogger is trying to rest but is too wired and buzzing to to rest much, even with a temperature and a sore throat.

This morning, I scooted out of the house and down to church and forgot my breakfast, again! :)

The sun was shining over the sea and it was a cold winter day but I had to hurry and get to church to help.

I was allocated a stall at the fayre, it happened to be the craft stall, and I got covered in glitter and looked very festive as I tried to undo the ornemental boxes that the kids had made, because they had generously applied glitter glue, and some of the boxes were stuck shut! :)

It was a fun but busy morning and I enjoyed it, running the craft stall and chatting to my friends, and it was quite a generous morning, because, as with the other Christmas event, I ended up being given loads of stuff, cards, presents, mince pies, sweets, decorations, I came home tired, hungry, and laden with goodies.

I am very tired and my throat and head are sore, but leg a bit better. I certainly don't have flu, as the mean old doctor vaccinated me, and this doesn't seem to be a cold, yet. Dunno what it is.
I can't find the bag of lozenges anywhere, even though they were by the bed this morning, but at least I found a decent version of 'O' Holy Night' on Youtube.

I am on stand-down for the moment, it gets busy again tomorrow as well as the weather turning nasty.
It is nice to try and relax and do not a lot, but rather hard to do that as well, because December is buzzing with things happening.


Tuesday Morning

Good morning,

Well, I was tired and I slept.

I woke this morning with a sore throat, one leg aching and the other with cramp, nightmares and flashbacks troubling me, so I felt very low when I woke in the dark early morning, so I stayed in bed and dozed, I am tired anyway, and the dozing only produced bad dreams as well. Who hates Tuesdays?

I am drinking my tea, I need a shower and I have to head for church in less than an hour to help out.

There is a clear sky and a glorious sunrise on another cold day.


Monday 8 December 2014

Monday evening

Good evening,

A very tired blogger writes this.

This morning I biked to gym assessment.
I was told by my trainer that my leg injury is a shin splint rather than a tendon strain.
I have never had a shin splint before, it is painful, I used to train with someone who was prone to shin splints and they were in pain a lot. I have to avoid impact on that leg for the moment, so my gym was only slightly disrupted, I had a good workout and then a swim, then I biked home along the cliffs on a glorious clear, cold and sunny morning.

I had a teabreak, set off again for meetings and errands, home for lunch, off again to caretake my friend's house, then health and fitness, where I am only losing weight all the time and have nearly finished the set programme but will continue, albeit at another location and in a different way, it has been a success.

Anyway, home from there, quick break, bit of writing, and back out to church social.

Church social was good, and then I got some groceries and walked home under a clear starry sky, a cold night with a bright moon, the cliffs so quiet and deserted and the calm sea rippling in the cold wind and breaking gently on the shore far below the cliffs.
Home and very tired, catching up with emails and writing.

Tomorrow I help with another church Christmas event, then I have a haircut and some shopping.

Then the serious Christmas Dinner season starts after tomorrow, thankfully I am allowe any amount of turkey, and I have just had turkey fillets for my supper, as I sometimes do, cooked from raw, nothing added, very good for you.

Monday morning

Good morning,

Well, I was having distressing dreams about Jersey and Winchester, and I woke into flashbacks and depression, with my leg aching.

I am supposed to be at gym assessment in an hour and I don't feel like it at all, I have a long and busy day ahead, and although I have prepped for it, I feel rubbish, and my leg aches.

Well at least the stoopid Christmas cards have remained on the wall through the night. I am not putting them back up if they fall down.

It's a cool morning with light cloud, and a faint orange dawn over the sea.


Sunday 7 December 2014

Sunday evening

Good evening,

The blogs are statting high, especially Jersey stats, whatsup Jersey?

Well, I have been boredly cleaning, tidying, cooking, doing chores and tasks, writing cards, doing task lists, all the boring stuff, but also watching 'The Naked Gun' on repeat and enjoying Christmas Carols.
I didn't go to the carol service this afternoon, it was probably crowded and I will have Carol overload by Christmas.




Sunday afternoon

Good afternoon,

Well I had a lovely day in London, lovely skating and photography and fellowship.

I got home at about 8.30pm yesterday evening, but I was tired.

I walked home through the cold and frost, knowing the temperature would rise as the rain and wind came in.

I had a shower, did some writing and went to sleep.

I woke this morning and biked into town in the early morning to drop cards and sponsor money and things off.

Then I came home along the front, the sea was lively.

I had a shower, put some cards together and went to church.

I am honest, I did not enjoy the visiting speaker's service, but afterwards I talked to my friends and drank tea.
I have really crocked my leg by skating. Ouch.


Anyway, after church I came home, I didn't fancy a full roast, so I did some mini fillets and ate them on their own, didn't even add bread.

Then I have been Christmas and grocery shopping, and just got home, very tired, I may rest and watch movies.

Saturday 6 December 2014

saturday , London

Good morning,

Well I had an awesome skate at the outdoor rink at Somerset House, then a photoshoot of the Christmas arcade.
Now I am sitting on the terrace, about to set off on the rest of the adventure.
It is a glorious day.

saturday morning, London bound

Good morning,

Well I slept well but woke with a cramp in my leg and said nortywords.

I got up in the dark early morning and made tea.

My money was in, so I was London bound.

Waiting on the small platform for the train, the platform was covered in thick frost and the moon hung in a clear and starry sky. The moon set as we travelled, it was all funny and yellow then.


I am now on the third leg of the journey, due into London at about 8.50. And it  is getting light , a brilliant clear dawn over frosty fields.

One of the other people from my house is on the train with me by coincidence, having taken the same route at the same time, but she isn't going to London.

London must be nortyfied pre-christmas, and there is hot chocolate and ice skating and fellowship to be had.



Friday 5 December 2014

Friday evening

Good evening,

At lunchtime I cooked a huge dish of fish and rice, enough for lunch and supper.

Then I went to the library and also booked a haircut.

Then I went in one of the chattery shops, they do good cards there, and they had Christmas cards at a decent price, so I got some, some of my friends only like like Christmas cards that refer to the Nativity and the meaning of Christmas, so I was pleased that the Chattery shop had some at a good price.

I managed to have my much-missed bike ride along the front today, it was great, a calm sea and the hills blue in the cold air.

I came home and have been writing and also finishing the paperchain, which is now up.

The paperchain looks gloriously lopsided, but it will do.

I went out to get the local paper, and it is cold out, with Christmas lights shining everywhere and the gritting lorry is out.
The first Christmas trees and lights started to appear mid-November, haha, me and Mum saw the first one when she was over here then. These days people put fairy lights up as soon as the long nights begin, a winter thing rather than Christmas.

And what about Black Friday? We are not American, we do not celebrate Thanksgiving (yet) so why are we made to hear about black friday all the time? Just a way of selling more. Last year they had just come up with making the sheeple celebrate black friday and were feeding them 'Black Friday' as a click word on repeat, the way to do it is to get old church ladies to say it and go 'what does that mean?' over and over.
Oh, and then they add 'cyber monday' to make people buy more stuff. Does it make people happier or better off? No, poor sheeple, if they were told that standing on their heads once a day would make them healthy wealthy and wise, they would do it, especially if they were told that people in America do it.

Anyway, I have also been having conversations with my adoptive mum. Earlier this week I was overjoyed to get a text saying we were all having a weekend and going to London, but then dismayed when health problems their end cancelled it, this happens a lot, as you may have realised if you have been reading the blog, but it still throws me when it happens.
So anyway, it looks like I can go to London on my own tomorrow if my money comes through, so I can see my beloved winter London of hot chocolate and ice skating, and see our friends, and then Mum is coming over to see me during the week, although we have ended up in a bit of a muddle over when as we collectively have various Christmas events to attend and other things to do.

My December quick diary looks so busy.

I think I need an early night, because even if I don't go to London tomorrow, I still have a lot to do, lots of local Christmas events going on etc.


Friday lunchtime

Good lunchtime,

Well last night I got my washing done, and I watched Miracle on 4th Street and started on paper chains. I don't remember paperchains being such hard work before! I haven't done them since I was a kiddie.

Anyway, I knocked myself out with 5HTP and slept a long night with very busy and complicated dreams.

When I woke this morning I got up and put the linens in the wash, did some paperwork, and then biked to the leisure centre for swim and gym.
I have only just got back, believe it or not.

The linens are drying.

It is a cold but beautuful Winter's day, the hills are blue in the mist and cold, the sea is calm and it is a cold but nice day.


Thursday 4 December 2014

Thursday evening

Good evening,

Well it was a cold grey drizzly afternoon when I sluggishly headed for swim and gym.

I had a good gym and swim and it did liven me up. Free training is much better than the set routine I had to start with.

I came home through the cold drizzle and dark, stopped on the way to get coloured pencils and sellotape, why? :) yeah! Gonna do paperchains! :):):) keeping the norty out of mischeef!

When I got home, I found my DVD of Miracle on 34th Street and put it on to play, and I put the fairy lights on.
How Christmassy! :)

I am vaguely working, I am still a bit confused about my new place and what goes where, so a little trail of odds and ends keeps wandering round the flat, looking for a home.

I have put some washing on, but as usual, someone nicked the tumble dryer use as soon as I did, dunno why they do that.

I need to put some eggs on for tea, and continue sorting things out. As well as watching the movie.

Thursday lunchtime

Good lunchtime,

Well I slept soundly and woke groggy, depressed and in flashbacks.

I got up, wandered through the shower and several cups of tea, and was pleased to find some money had come in, my finances are still in transition with the new house, but there was enough to go into town and collect my computer and then do a small amount of shopping.
The problem is, I have three long shopping list, house stuff, groceries and Christmas stuff, so I started with house stuff.

I came home, set the computer up, and then went back out to the next town along to do some more shopping, groceries, christmas stuff and house stuff.
As well as the move and the money being in transition, everything ran low while I was on the walk, so everything was low anyway due to the move and  then not getting stocked up, so now I have been buying, but there is still a lot to get and now the money is low until the next lot, which should be within the next few days.

While I was in the next town, I dropped in at the Christmas tree festival, which was really good, the best tree of course, was my friends' tree, and I'm not just saying that, they won the cup last year.

It is a cold and chilly wet day. This morning I stood on the cliff tops, the sky over the sea was dark with cloud and the sea was rough, white caps breaking.

I think it is trying to snow, although the long range forecast is for cold weather but nothing extreme up to Christmas, no snow, no dreadful floods like last year.

I have gym and swim shortly and I may or may not take up the invitation to dance this evening, I am low energy this week, don't really want to do anything.


Wednesday 3 December 2014

Wednesday night

Good evening,

Well we finished at 9.45pm, amd I am lucky to have got a lift home as it is two bus rides away.
Tired now, sleep.

Wednesday Afternoon

Good afternoon,

Yesterday afternoon I had to go and collect my bike as I had left it in town while we did the furniture removals.
The bike was chewing through it's tether and trying to bite the other bikes, dunno where it gets it's nortyness from.

Anyway, it was a cold evening and I drifted into sleep early and slept deeply, woke from nightmares into flashbacks which have continued through the day.

I think being in a new place sets my brain off with the fear of being trapped by the diocese and their police, so hopefully the bad dreams and morning depression will settle eventually.

Anyway, I woke at 6am, and staggered into the shower and a cup of tea.

Then I did odds and ends and stood on the cliff top as the sun rose through the clouds over the sea and into a clear sky.

Eventually I headed for church, where I spent the morning helping with a Christmas Fayre, that was fun, and I was sent home with three Christmas parcels and a new teddy (the toy kind, not the norty kind)
This is a very norty song about teddies https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wn6HI5JQBhQ

My day is far from over, no rest for the norty, I wont get home until late.


Tuesday 2 December 2014

Tuesday evening

Good evening,

Well we moved the furniture, me, my friend and the lesser spotted landlady.

Then the lesser spotted landlady hugged me and told me to call round any time.

Then I worked out where the furmiture lived in the new flat.

I also worked out the bin emptying and refuse collection routine, so now I feel like I live here.
I am happy to have my table and chairs here.

I am very tired, can hardly bother with routines, will go to bed soon.

Tomorrow on duty at a church Christmas event, and then a new venture.

Tuesday afternoon

Good afternoon,

I biked to coffee morning, it is a cold cloudy, breezy winter's day, with flurries of cold wet falling from the sky.

Coffee was good, and I got sponsor money and recounted the walk again to various askers.

Then I headed for a meeting, which turned out to be positive.
Then I headed home along the cliffs. the sea is cold and rather rough today, after a few days of calm.

I did mini chicken fillets for lunch, small, nutritious, easy to cook, good for you.

I am now waiting to go and collect furniture from the old house in about half an hour.

I have to start organizing what is happening where, as the run up to Christmas is so busy.