Introduction

This is a merge of my 'Wanderer' blog that tells of two years of my three years on the streets, and a new blog that tells of my life after the Diocese of Winchester ripped through my life for for the last few years on top of the previous serious harm that left me homeless
This is a day to day blog of my life as I continue to survive, work on recovery and on the social problems that I have and try to come to terms with limitless traumas I have survived along the way.
This blog is in tandem with my blog about my experiences in the Church of England http://whatreallyhappenedinthechurch.blogspot.co.uk/

Saturday, 18 April 2015

Saturday Afternoon

Good afternoon,

Well I haven't blogged since yesterday morning.

Yesterday I put my sun  lotion on, and went to work with a teeshirt and no jumper, and it rained, haha.

It didn't rain much but it stayed cloudy with light showers.

The rain didn't come to much, the soil was so dry it was hard to weed.
I had been so worried about Thursday and Friday because of pain andhot sun and hard work but actually both day went well, and yesterday I got a lift home as well so that helped, and I stopped the painkillers after lunch and have been OK.
I will have to get some advice though, because codeine is addictive and if my return to being a gardener is going to mean more pain, then I will have to see what the alternatives are.

So, I got home early, and just did the usual tv and dinner, writing, music, and relaxing.

I had another night of vivid dreams, still getting fear dreams that the Diocese attack again and drive me from my home.
I had a bit of a lie in this morning, then I put the washing on and did my music.
I did a clothes wash, including my work clothes, hung that out and put the bed linens and mats on to wash, I was most miffed when the birds dive bombed my washing on the line, and my pyjamas and knickers suddenly looked like I had had an accident! The birds were snickering in the trees and I was most put out.

Anyway, the washing is all washed and dried and I cooked special potatos and a kind of personal recipe of beef, onions and potatos, fried, as well.
I have done a lot of music today, and have also been out to deliver letters and drop my prescriptions off.

It has been a sunny day with a strong cold wind, the sea has been rough, foamy and roaring.
It was roaring all day yesterday but I hardly got to see it.
It is difficult to know what to wear in weather like this, sunny but cold in the wind or shade.

Now I am sitting at the computer and Pie in the Sky is on tv.


Friday, 17 April 2015

Friday Morning

Good morning,

Well I slept reasonably well, vivid and sad dreams, but still in pain and on codiene this morning.
I often dream about my parents and family, and I did last night, but the night before last I dreamed I accepted a job in Salisbury to escape the Diocese, but I missed the sea so much. It was a vivid dream.
I do like Salisbury very much, it is West Country attitude there :) Anyone from Salisbury reading this? Yay Salisbury! I love you! :)

I just need to shower and dress and then run for the bus. I have to get two buses to my work on nthe grounds team and the buses are hit and miss, so I have to set out early.

It is a cool and breezy morning and the sun is behind a cloud haze at the moment. It would help me if it stays that way.


Thursday, 16 April 2015

Thursday evening

Good evening,

Well, today wasn't too bad at all.
I didn't do any cleaning, I did four hours of digging but didn't feel too bad, although I am on painkillers at the moment, the sun stayed mainly behind cloud and haze, which really helped me.
Then I went to the charity shop for my shift, and it was quiet, so I mainly sorted stock, took over the till a few times, and generally it was a peaceful afternoon in the cool, quiet shop.

I came home, did my usual routines and music practice, and now ready for bed, I am all codeined up, but I may have to get up in the night for painkillers, but I am looking forward to my work tomorrow, and then it is the weekend! :)

Thursday Morning

Good morning,

I don't feel well, and it is going to be a hot day again, not looking forward to work today.

I have four hours gardening and cleaning and then a shift at the charity shop.

At the moment the sun is hidden by cloud.
I wish it would stay hidden today.

Wednesday, 15 April 2015

Wednesday Evening

Good evening,

Well it has been a hot and busy day, with some hard work in the sun, some chatter in the charity shop and other new things.

I am very tired due to the early start and nightmares, so I have the back massage on and I will go to bed early.

The next two days are busy and the weather is looking hot.


Wednesday morning

Good morning,

It is just getting light, a cold clear morning. The birds are singing noisily and the cat is washing it's back leg, OCD cat.

I had nightmares and woke early, on a day off!

I haven't rebooked Monday's work for today so I have a visit to a garden I will probably be doing later, and that is all apart from something this evening.
So I can plod on with music practice and paperwork.

Continued:
I biked down to the bay and biked along and back and watched the sun rise, there is some mist on the bay and on the reserve, and the sun rose all red and orange out of the mist over the Eastern Hills.
It is so cold that there is some frost, and the birds are singing cheerfully.


Tuesday, 14 April 2015

Tuesday Evening

Good evening,

Well what a long day!

Last night I was tired and I went to bed early. But I had nightmares, and I woke myself up by screaming for help.
The cat was sitting there with his eyes very round when I woke because I was screaming.
The cat considered what help I might need, decided that I didn't, licked his paws, and wandered off.

It was 4am, but I no longer get up if I wake at 4am, because I need to encourage good sleeping patterns. So I dozed off again, it always makes it harder for me to wake in the morning, and so I struggled to wake when the alarm went off, but I had a long trip to the dentist to make.
We live in a poor economic area and the nearest NHS dentist is 8 miles away, two bus rides away.

So I scrambled into some clothes and tea, and didn't have time for breakfast or a shower, and off I went.
The thing is, you either leave early to get to these places and end up early sometimes, or risk not getting there in time.
I arrived early, and so I got some important stuff done in town.

The dentist was fine, I have to go back in three weeks. I always get a headache from the dentist, presumably because of my jaw being sensitive and TMJ.

After dentist I headed for the charity shop and a productive shift of work there, then I headed home via the library and the supermarket.

At home I watched the Simpsons and Hollyoaks while doing some music, and eating supper.
Then I did the Tuesday housework, which is hoovering and cleaning and doing the bins as tomorrow is bin day.

Then I have been doing music and had a shower.

The night air is drifting in the window and it smells sharp and smoky, too tempting to go out for a walk, but I am now in my pyjamas, and although the neighbours are used to me, I don't think I will try that! :)

Another early night I think.




Monday, 13 April 2015

Monday evening

Good evening,

Well I had a busy quiet day, doing paperwork, posting letters, doing music practice, watching favourite programmes.
My bike ride wasn't much fun, because the fog, which is more like a pollution cloud, is hanging over the bay and the town, cold and ominous, the foghorns are blaring as I write this.

I have been out for an evening walk, but the cold eerie fog remains, it is not natural at all. Some people in the high street were scared by it earlier. It is not good for my lungs and I don't like being out in it.

Still, today has been both restful and productive, and I will have an early night, I have the dentist in the morning, and then brief business in town before a shift at the charity shop, the week then goes as normal except that I have cut down to one day on the grounds team and will be viewing and probably working in, a new garden on Wednesday, and possibly doing the garden that was cancelled today on Wednesday, I have something else on Wednesday but I won't tell you about that yet.

Right, time to fight the cat for a place in my bed.


Monday Morning

Good morning,

Yesterday afternoon was nice when the mist cleared. So I biked around and had an ice cream on the beach.

I went to the welfare, it was busy there and a fight broke out at one point.

Then I went riding on the buses and when I got home I watched Wallace and Gromit and read some of my library books.

The cat was in a biting mood at bed time, so I evicted him and went to sleep.
I slept reasonably well, and woke at 8am, which is OK for a day off! :)
This is my last day off.

It was a lovely sunny morning and just as I was thinking of biking along the front, the mist came down thickly, this weather is like this at the moment, one moment it is good, the next it is bad.

I did bacon and eggs for breakfast, healthy bacon and eggs, and coffee.

I am sitting here listening to Magic FM and thinking about all the things that need doing, my brain is very driven. It would be less driven if I was free from the evil of the Church of England. I would have a lot more life then.






Sunday, 12 April 2015

Sunday Afternoon

Good afternoon,

Well yesterday evening I had a nice bike ride along the bay, people were fishing, and there was a strong cold breeze.
I stopped for groceries, came home and had a quiet evening watching Pie in the Sky and Call the Midwife.

Then I had a restless night with nightmares about the Church of England, the poor cat got seasick and left at 3am.

Yesterday started off rainy and turned sunny, today is just simply sunny, but the cold breeze remains.

I have been writing, did a quick load of washing, and cooked a delectable roast dinner, followed by coffee, there was fresh fruit for dessert but I was too full from crisp roast potatos, grilled turkey fillets with low fat cream cheese, carrots and gravy.

I have done some writing and printing things off, and a bit of tidying, music, and laughing at how corny 'Murder She Wrote' is.


Saturday, 11 April 2015

Saturday evening

Good evening,

Well what a rotten day for sport! :)

This morning I did bacon and eggs for breakfast and then I set off on a shopping trip to Poundland in the next town.
While I was there, I remembered that I had to go and talk about that new garden.
So I hurried home, dropped the groceries off, and went to that meeting.

That went well, and then I went to the charity shop, and we talked about my walk, and how I am inspired to try out a new walk.
We also talked sport as well, I am a Cambridge to the death person, and my boss is an Oxford to the death person, so of course we argued, and he was right, I bet he is celebrating.
The other sport of course was the National, and after wandering round the shops, I hurried home to watch the sport.
All the political parties are hounding shoppers in town, I am sure I could create some fun out of that.

The National brought all the horses home safe, which was good, but my poor old horse was derailed by a riderless horse when he was doing so well! :(
Poor old Across The Bay! You can see why I chose him. I didn't have time to look at jockeys, trainers or race records, so I picked Across the Bay for obvious reasons, his Name.
When I look across the Great Ship Bay to the Great Hill, I find relief from the grief and horror of what the Church of England have done to me.
Those of you who are familiar with nortylanguage would think I would back shutthedoor. Well he did run well, but no, I had so little time to look at the National that I just picked the name that resounded most with me, and my horse could have won if he hadn't been derailed.

So, my horse was derailed, and Oxford rowed a faultless race while Cambridge never really got going.
Well at least I peeled the potatoes for tonight and tomorrow's meals while I watched.
I also grilled some turkey and had a cuppa.

I need to get teabags and bread, and have a quick bike ride and then settle to music practice.

I can't believe it! Pie in the Sky is on! Can I watch it without flashbacks?
Call the Midwife is on later. Will I get any music done?!

Saturday Morning

Good morning,

Well yesterday the cold mist lifted and produced a hot sunny day.
I went to bike down the front and I was wearing a jumper and I ended up too hot! :)

I biked along, the sea was calm and the tide was in, people were sunbathing and the children were paddling, it is almost swim in the sea time again.
I sat on the front and had an ice cream to celebrate the walk.

I have made a good recovery from the walk already, apart from the bad leg, which needs a scan.
I spent a lot of yesterday re-arranging things in my room.

Then, just as I was getting sleepy last night, my landlady and her daughter came round, they didn't stay long, but when they had gone, I fell into bed and slept deeply.

My housemate must be back on shifts, because she went out early this morning and I woke up, thinking it was something like 9am, but it was only 7.30.

I am sitting here, listening to Magic FM. It is raining outside and I have very little to do today, music practice and maybe a bit of shopping at Poundland in the next town.


Friday, 10 April 2015

Friday Afternoon

Good afternoon,

Well, yesterday I got home from the walk, walk completed, and I fell asleep for four hours! So I missed the Simpsons and Hollyoaks.
The problem was, once I woke up, my body clock was confused and I had a restless night, awake some of the time, and then I overslept a bit this morning, which was OK as I am on leave.

I have been to the big supermarket for a shop, booked a haircut, been to the library, done some writing, put the washing on, and am relaxing and doing odds and ends.

It is a grey day today. I will go out on my bike and also pick up my inhaler prescription. I mustn't run out of the life-giving breathing medicine! :)


Thursday, 9 April 2015

Thursday evening

Good evening,

Sorry for the gap in blog. I have been walking.
The walk completed today at 3.55pm. But I collected my guitar on the way home, and when I got home, I lay down on the bed for a nap, and slept until 8pm!

I dreamed a lot, no real nightmares, just lots of stuff and a few Bishops and documents.
I have just been watching coast.

I am sunburned, a lot, but at least I remembered my suncream today, in time for a misty day's walk!

Yesterday after a restless night, I walked in paradise on a long and beautiful day's walk in the sun and the cool breeze.
Last night I washed my clothes and hung them to dry and got some groceries as everything had run out.
So Although I still had an early night, it wasn't as early as previous nights.
I had a lot of horrible nighgtmares about Jersey and the Diocese.

I struggled slightly with waking up, a bit tired.

We already knew this was the last day, as I had been walking so steadily this week. So I wasn't due to get a lift home.
It was a hard day's walking and the mist swirled, but I could see my way and the cliff edge at all times.

I walked home, 70 miles. 4 Days. My walking holiday, my trek for charity, over.

I am now on holiday to recover from a walk that technically I can't even do, which I do every year anyway.
I have a garden to assess on Saturday but apart from that, I am now on holiday, resting.


Tuesday, 7 April 2015

Tuesday evening

Walking all day in the hot hot sun, I fought the door and the door won.
Well, I have walked all day in the hot sun, and I am burned, tired, blistered,
the toughest part of the walk is done.
With three days to go, I am about halfway.

My lift lost her phone and we nearly lost each other, but found each other and I got home, did supper, did the bins, watched my usual programmes, did tomorrows lunch.
Basically everything is done apart from apart from a bath.

The walk was beautiful in the spring sunshine, spring flowers everywhere.

Monday, 6 April 2015

Easter Monday Evening

Good evening,

Well, what a cracking day to start the walk.
Awesome weather, good luck with the tides, and covered maybe 22 miles to start with.
The end of the walk this afternoon was beautiful, walking along the shore, the tide in and a turquoise sea, lots of happy families enjoying the sea and sun and Easter Holiday.
And there was my friend waiting to collect me, and she brought a flask of tea and some chocolate with her.

I got home and immediately did an instant macaroni cheese, and had a bath, sorted out clothes and a packed lunch for tomorrow.

I have a slightly pulled tendon but otherwise am not too bad. So it is massage machine and deep heat and hope for the best.

I had to choose between the usual Simpsons and Hollyoaks and Nanny McPhee, so I watched the Simpsons and am now watching Nanny McPhee.

Early night, for an early start in the morning.



Sunday, 5 April 2015

Easter Sunday Evening

Good evening peeps,

Well, I have been busy with tasks, bringing my task list right down so that I can focus on the walk.
I had a lovely Easter morning with worship, and a nice roast dinner, then I have done my music and a load of other tasks as well as a few bike rides on the bay.
Sadly everywhere is crowded with grockles and we have about six months before we are rid of them again, but never mind.

It turned from a grey day into a sunny one, but bitterly cold.

I am now going to have a quick bath and an early night, and when I wake in the morning it is onwards into the Great Walk!
The packed lunch and backpack is done, I am all set, just got to sleep and wake now.

Easter Sunday Morning

Hallelujah, Christ is risen! :)

Once for a gardener Mary did mistake you
in the grey dawn of the first Easter Day
Lord we have gardens and fain we would make You
Master of all their resplendant array
(The hymn of the Hampshire Countryside)

Good morning, another grey start, who forgot to order the Easter weather with sunshine and chikkins and daffodils?

I had vivid dreams, but I woke feeling relaxed, and woke a bit late again, the only two lie-ins I ever get.

Shrek 3 is keeping me amused.

Tomorrow the journey starts :)

After a neck and neck battle, my first letter to the Bishop of Winchester hits 1000 on Open Letter, with the second letter trailing 30 behind.


Saturday, 4 April 2015

Easter Saturday Evening

Good evening.

What is a holiday? A time when you do everything that you don't have time to do when you are at work.
What is a grockle, a person with much money but few braincells, who blocks the whole of the seafront as you try to bike along.

Anyway.

Busy day running through task lists and music and shopping and bike rides and housework.
At least I got a lot done. Although technically I should be resting.

It has been a cold bleak day, but I don't mind that, I enjoyed bike rides and loads of housework and some music.

At least there have been some decent films on.


Easter Saturday Morning

Good morning,

Well it was a long day yesterday, hence no evening update.

In the morning I missed the Walk of Witness as I was trying to sort out paperwork for the sponsored walk.

I got into town just in time for the Midday Service as the buses were on a Bank Holiday service and Go-Slow.
The Midday service was good. It was what I expect from that church, because they are good.

Then I popped into the shop to drop the walk paperwork off and have a cuppa and things, the shop was only open for a few hours.

Then I got caught up in talking to someone when I was trying to hurry to church.

I had the choice of two 3pm services and I caught the bus to one of them.
It was good, but it did go on for two hours.
I always forget that the Gospel is 5 pages on Good Friday, and standing for the whole thing when it is sung, is hard work.
I went dizzy and nearly fell down the steps.

Then I made my way home, for the next service.

The next service of course, was remembering The Passover. Which I did alone, because there are no Jewish people in the district.

All I did was read the Passover Story, which makes me cry, because my Dad always read it, and I prepared the lamb and bitter herbs.
Normally we used to dress in our best clothes for Passover, but this time I decided it was fitting to eat standing and in my walking clothes as my ancestors did. Because, in perfect symmetry, not only am I able to have the seven day holiday for the first time, but I am also starting the pilgrimage on Monday.
My passover meal of lamb, bitter herbs and Schloer instead of wine, was was very nice.

Then I went down to the sea in the rain. Then I went and got provisions for the walk.

When I came home, I did all the hoovering and cleaning and polished the boots.
Then I put clean linens on the bed, the cat gets miffed when the bed has no linens and is all in a heap.

I went to bed early, I had a restless night with church and Jersey nightmares, I wonder if the cat gets seasick when I am restless.
I woke and it was still dark and I fell asleep again, and woke late, although for once that is entirely permitted.

I have had breakfast and written a letter in response to the one I got in the post.
The cat is chasing a Bertolli tub round the kitchen, he has bertolli on his face.

It is a grey rainy day.

I have a new garden to arrange but I am on holiday and I must be strict and ask to arrange it next weekend.

I didn't get the job I applied for, apparently I came joint second in the final decision, after being in the shortlist of eight, to be honest I don't care, I would prefer not to take on a full time job, but I am going to continue applying for jobs as well as taking on gardens.


Friday, 3 April 2015

Good Friday Morning

Good morning,

It is raining.

I slept reasonably well, although for about an hour during the night I was awake and suffering utter horrors about how the diocese of winchester and their police have treated me.

I woke this morning feeling quite relaxed, knowing it was holiday time.

I was hoping to join the walk of witness but I am working on things to do with the sponsored walk and it is running over, so I will join the midday and 3pm services.

I have the two services and short visit to the charity shop with the sponsored walk stuff, and got to drop of a key at one of the houses I garden for.

I was woken by the phone this morning and I thought it was the job I applied for saying a flat no as voicemail came up so soon, but it was a friend leaving a message.
My phone has a good speaker, those of you who know I can hardly use a phone.

I got my work clothes washed last night and they are dry this morning, and now I have put the linens and towels and mats on to wash.

Over the weekend I will do my household tasks as normal and also put the preparations for the Walk together and of course go to church.

Those who wonder what has happened to my church and social life, I have been focussing on employment and seeing if I am physically and mentally employable. I seem to have won through.

I know I'm on holiday because the television is on during the day, but I must finish off and get to town.

Thursday, 2 April 2015

Thursday Evening

Good evening,

Please excuse the lack of blog, I have been a bit busy and tired.

Yesterday I went to work on the grounds team.
It was a fine day and lots of people around.
The head gardener was away so I just worked steadily on my tasks.

At the end of the day, I went home, did some writing, had a bath.
I meant to have an early night after a hard day's work and before another hard day's work.
But writing meant I was up late, and exhausted.

I had extreme difficulty waking up and getting up this morning.
I tried to wake but was too tired.
I fell into a nightmare about the work I was due to do this morning.
In the nightmare, the guy I was working for was completely re-ordering my wages, and the sun was shining instead of the forecast rain, this man then said he was getting me a grass box for the mower, and simply forgot about me, and instead of being the elite customer he is in real life, he turned into a fat man with a load of children, and, forgetting all about me, left me to deal with his children, who were not very polite, while I realised I was still in my pyjamas and tried to find somewhere away from the children's intrusions in order to get dressed.

I was relieved to wake up, running late and tired, and with pouring rain outside, I got to work an hour later than I had planned, but it is flexible hours, I had two hours cleaning and two hours gardening, and fortunately my client had not turned into a fat man with lots of children.

However, my task to start with was ironing, and his iron is useless, so it was an extremely stressful start to the day, but once the ironing was done, I was in the garden, working hard and making progress, so I felt better, the rain had stopped.

Being an hour late was fine as it is flexible, but that did have a knock on effect on my shift at the charity shop, because after 4 hours work for this client, I was due on a four hour shift at the shop.
So I phoned and asked to be late and that was fine.

So, tired, aching, a bit muddy, I turned up at the shop, and the bosses grinned.

We had a good afternoon, fairly quiet, I minded the shop a bit, sorted some stock, and we made some arrangements about the Great Walk.

Then finally it was home time, and although we closed up and left a bit late, at last I am on holiday!
Well, I get Good Friday and the weekend and then the walk, but after all this working back into work, I am tired and all I have focussed on for weeks is work, now it is Easter, and Church takes a chunk of my holiday time.

This evening is the Vigil, and tomorrow will be noon and 3pm services, I do have odds and ends to do, but basically I am now not gardening or in the shop until the week after next, apart from briefly in the shop tomorrow between services.
I love my work but because my body is damaged by the Diocese and Police and homelessness, the work is a strain on me, and I am hoping things will get easier rather than me being forced to give up my career.
I feel that I will be able to continue, but I will always ache.

Mum texted me about feet washing and toenails, one of the silly things the church does is try to re-enact Jesus washing people's feet, silly, embarassing.
Anyway, I came home and on the way, I stopped to get some meat for supper, and I ended up buying the things for the Passover Meal, because as well as being Good Friday, it is Passover tomorrow.

The Passover meal consists of  lamb, bitter herbs, and normally wine, but I have got Schloer as I don't drink wine and there was no grape juice in the store but there was Schloer, which is sparkling grape juice used as an alternative to wine, and it was on offer, so I am pleased. My bitter herbs this year is Spinach, often it is dark cabbage. This is a good iron rich meal.
I have not got the unleavened bread yet, Ryveta is unleavened bread.

My Easter parcel contained fruit and flapjacks and a little yellow chikkin. A few years ago I used to wander around with one of those chikkins, at the time when the Diocese of Winchester first launched their constructive murder of me.

I have had my supper and am doing my usual Simpsons and Hollyoaks and on repeat.


Wednesday, 1 April 2015

Wednesday Morning

Good morning,

Well, I certainly slept, and dreamed sad and bad dreams about the Church of England.

I woke when the cat walked along me, that cat has no idea about boundaries.

I got up at 6am, my housemate never came home last night.

I am showered, dressed in clean clothes, fed, and ready to head for work in 15 minutes.

The sun rose rad and pink and gold over the sea and the sky is clear.

I did my shopping last night and the stars were out.

It is gonna be so busy with visitors at work on this fine day.

Tuesday, 31 March 2015

Tuesday Evening

Good evening,

Well I walked along the bay, but although the waves were rough, they were not awesome, I got a few pictures.

Then I went to the chattery shop, and wandered around doing odds and ends, finished early for the interview.

The interview was along the bay, so I came home and re-assembled myself and walked along the bay to the interview, feeling as if I was walking to my doom.

Actually I had a very good interview. They started by simply giving me a pen, paper and clipboard and tipping me out into the grounds to assess the grounds and write what I could see that needed doing.
My speciality, lists, and working alone on my initiative, which is what I do anyway.
So I wandered around and apparently they needed five minutes to look at my list, the lad seemed quite cheerful about it 'Give them another five minutes' he said cheerfully after his walkie talkie spoke to him, so I was chatting to the guy at the desk about my work and his dog and things.

Then the interview questions.
I met two directors and they said they liked my list, and they alternately questioned me and got me to do a plant identification test, which I passed, apparently got 100% but I think I fluffed one plant.
But I was good enough, I didn't look silly at all.

So, the interview generally went well. Ok, some of the questions were tricky, but I am pleased to say, I was one of 8 shortlisted and I certainly had a good interview.

My employability course for myself is quite good, a bit like my being my own carer, maybe I should take over the NHS and the DWP, only joking!

I came home, feeling a bit like people do feel after something like that, it is hard to focus, but, I did sausages, beans and special potatos for my tea, and did the bins and the washing up and the surfaces.

The cat has spent most of the day on the stairs, but now he is on my bed, looking like lemur.

The high winds continue but no flooding or really serious damage, although there have been a few trees down.









Tuesday Morning

Good morning,

Well, galeforce winds hit us during the night, it really howled, and it is still howling, unfortunately the winds mean that one of my two interviews has already been cancelled as the interviewer is from outside the area and cannot get here because of the weather! Unfair. But they are hoping to interview me tomorrow, according the message, although how I can do that when I am on the grounds team, I don't know. Tomorrow is my last day on the grounds team before Easter and the Great Walk.

Anyway, I was tired and went to bed early after a bath last night, the cat was going to stay, but he started biting me, he is a strange cat, so I tipped him out.
I slept, but I had a lot of vivid dreams.

I dreamed that we were under some sort of communist regime where people had to wear stripes if they had been abused or had relationships and that way no-one could make accusations of abuse. I was very focussed in the dream and I disputed this regime and said that some people could not simply disclose abuse and get stripes, they have to do it in their own time. I don't think we are quite as bad as that regime in real life, but certainly from comments I see on press and media articles about abuse, people are very ignorant and very cruel to abuse victims.

Anyway, the next dream was about sponsored events, I dreamed I got my walk mixed up with at least two other sponsored events, and I got very confused, and kept trying to start my walk or join other sponsored events.  Again it was very vivid.

I woke up to the howling wind, my housemate had either come in early or come in during the night and was going out again.

The cat is on the stairs, gnashing his teeth thoughtfully and looking like a little monster, well he is a little monster, I think the wind unsettles him.

So, my first interview is cancelled and that takes some of the pressure off, and I will go and look at the sea and get some pictures before I go to the charity shop.



Monday, 30 March 2015

Monday Evening

Good evening,

Well, what a day. My open letter to Korris seems to have provoked a reaction.
Never mind that, I do not know why that provoked a reaction when the others didn't.

Anyway, this morning I biked along the front, the waves were large and fluffy, I came home and put the lunch on, chop, potato and vegetables, a meal to give me energy for my work.

I got on with admin, and my housemate brought the new man home, err.

Anyway, the weather held and I went to do my garden clearance work, and came home after that, tired and full of thorns.

I got a phonecall offering me ANOTHER interview tomorrow.
So now I have two interviews to fit round my work. All good practice. Makes for a very nerve-wracking day though! Just add the dentist and a beating from the Diocese of Winchester's police.
No, don't.

Anyway, I have watched the Simpsons and Hollyoaks, and now I am watching them on repeat on 4+1. I need a bath, with thorn remover, and back restorer in it! :)

I looked at the weather forecast and screeched in disbelief. We have had gales but the windspeeds on the chart for tonight and tomorrow are incredible! I hope those bags of garden rubbish don't blow away.


Monday Morning _ Easter Week

Good morning,

Last night I went for a walk. I walked down to the bay and walked along the shore, the waves were roaring, I walked all the way along, my usual cycle route, the bay and five mile road were deserted and the cliffs loomed dark in the night, and the ships at anchor glowed on the bay, and I just walked peacefully.
Eventually I came home.

I let the cat stay in my room because he was too comfy to move, so he stayed on the bed, warm, purry, and hogging the covers, no wonder people stay single, sharing the duvet is no fun at all.

But the cat was a great comfort as I had another night of violent nightmares, I do not know where these nightmares are coming from as I haven't been watching horror or even Buffy, the nightmares are mainly about death and murder and violence. Awful.
Anyway, the cat was comforting, but he decided to go at about 3am.

I woke this morning at about 9am, new time, would have been 8am old time, I am still not used to the new time. But I woke to glorious sunshine, and a silent house, because my housemate never came home last night. The cat was getting worried and meowing at our doors.

I have no work this morning, I am supposed to be doing admin, but my garden this afternoon may be cancelled anyway because the bad weather will return later. Grr, I don't want to work over the Easter weekend, but I may have to work on Easter Saturday.

Anyway, I have had breakfast and I am dressed, the bed is made and the windows and curtains are open, my music books are ready, and I may make the most of this brief good weather before the bad weather comes back by biking down to the bay.

Well, this time next week, the Great Walk will have started. Hopefully I will be several hours into the walk by this time, and reaching point one of a four point first day. £55 was pledged over the weekend.

The Great Walk:

It surprises people,
worries some,
I walk 70 miles,
alone,

the terrain is rugged,
but stunning,
I walk quietly and think
and remember,

But why?
Well, to repay,
to help people,
to try to replace my inability to love
with compassion for others,

I walk because I need time out,
a change,
a holiday, 
but most of all to help others 
and show compassion.

Sunday, 29 March 2015

Sunday Evening

Good evening,

Well this morning, the clocks changing did upset things a bit.
I woke at what used to be 7.20am, only it was 8.20am now, and I was tired and achy, so I slept for another hour.
I got up, aching from the impact of the work I did yesterday and probably some from the pillow not supporting me.

I did my tea and toast, the galeforce winds howled outside.

I started a new open letter, and started the housework too.

I hadn't showered by 11am, so I hadn't been out, so by the time I was showered and dressed, it was time to put the lunch on.

Lunch was turkey steaks with roast potatos, carrots and gravy, followed by merangue with fat free yogurt and fresh fruit. Normally I have honey and rasperry yogurt, but the store had run out, so I had funny apricot yogurt that I don't like so much.

After lunch, I continued the letter and got on with my housework and tasks and my task list for the week.
I had a walk after lunch because the wind was too strong for biking, the sea was wild but I had missed the high tide, I will have another walk shortly though.

I finished the open letter and have done a lot of household tasks.
The cat is asleep on my bed.
I have done my music as well.

My housemate has been out a lot, so it has been a quiet strange day, with the usual routines a bit thrown by the clocks changing, it feels like time is all over the place and not at all what the clock says, normally time is just what the clock says.

I am still baffled by the DVD tv connection, it is not scart to scart, it is scart and three adaptors and even so, I can't get it set up.

Those of you who are wondering if I still do swim and gym, yes, but not at the moment because I am so busy, and I am doing a lot of exercise through being a gardener again.